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Duceswild99

Offline (the 05/21/2015 at 9:14pm) | Search for a member

Duceswild99

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 March 1988 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4354
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Duceswild99 : Nothing to share

Duceswild99's page activity

Visits<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 1:17pm<b>mikky8484</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 11:27am<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 7:45pm<b>sow_ay</b> - the 09/30/2012 at 6:13am

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Duceswild99's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44884) - you deserved it (4141)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML

#20491836
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11932) - you deserved it (30083)

On 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I discovered the true meaning of being scared shitless. My father in a clown costume emerged from my closet. Needless to say something emerged from me. FML

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

#20489402
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60068) - you deserved it (3693)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

Today, I had to slowly explain to my son that an "analogy" is a literary device, not a genre of porn. FML

#20481338
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28141) - you deserved it (3126)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

#20480699
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32143) - you deserved it (3344)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:57am - love - by pdub523 - United States (Texas)

Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

#20474800
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33351) - you deserved it (5396)

On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

#20470654
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21700) - you deserved it (42677)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today, my mom wished me "Happy Conception Day." FML

#20462817
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25974) - you deserved it (4017)

On 01/16/2013 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42938) - you deserved it (7377)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36981) - you deserved it (7119)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50557) - you deserved it (4849)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

#20447496
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36039) - you deserved it (5186)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:44am - misc - by no sleep for me -



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