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Doortje

Offline (the 12/18/2015 at 12:29am) | Search for a member

Doortje

17Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 April 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 26934
  • Number of comments : 1885
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Doortje : Best cupcake ever.

Doortje's page activity

Visits<b>Warriorflex</b> - 24 hours ago<b>agostina_mc</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 8:20pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 1:03am<b>PHP</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:53pm<b>jaala123</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:43am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:10pm<b>IcedSapphire</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 4:03pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 1:53am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:26pm<b>emisheah</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 11:23pm<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 9:45pm<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:12am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:30am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:21am<b>Rainbowkupkake</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 11:09pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 4:42am<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 9:45pm<b>uglykitty</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 5:09pm

Fucked!<b>emisheah</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 5:23am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 10:22am<b>eski2015</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 4:29pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:48pm<b>thatguy206</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 1:24am<b>Emmamazing</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 3:05am<b>Zebracat</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>16sparklytrees</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:24pm<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:06pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 4:52am<b>taffyluvr226</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 8:17am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:09pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 4:55am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:01am<b>Puffpie</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 9:42am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:30pm

Doortje's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Doortje's badges

Doortje's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14486) - you deserved it (80932)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46983) - you deserved it (4749)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

#17795601
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49384) - you deserved it (8607)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by ThisBlows (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML

#17786592
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34065) - you deserved it (8774)

On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55449) - you deserved it (6604)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

#17751753
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39841) - you deserved it (5848)

On 09/15/2011 at 4:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31892) - you deserved it (12507)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92465) - you deserved it (14559)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52242) - you deserved it (8257)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42456) - you deserved it (3019)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42456) - you deserved it (3019)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43291) - you deserved it (4606)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33385) - you deserved it (94416)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML

#17107547
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52900) - you deserved it (15453)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46499) - you deserved it (3841)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)



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