Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DontClickOnMe

Online | Search for a member

DontClickOnMe

38Fucked!

DontClickOnMeDontClickOnMe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8676
  • Number of comments : 297
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DontClickOnMe : You clicked on me. Oh my my my, are you gonna regret that. I guess your curiosity was just too much to handle, huh?

DontClickOnMe's page activity

Visits<b>Buck_Foy</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 5:51pm<b>WillC_04</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:28am<b>CanadiAnM8</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 9:20am<b>Fritz_Rfunny1</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:34am<b>tuxedoandex</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:26am<b>heyitscoley</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:58am<b>shitidied</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:16am<b>BoredChatter1234</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 1:56pm<b>indigohippopo</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 4:22am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:37am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:34pm<b>dogshorsescats</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 2:49pm<b>thebosnian</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:59am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 7:49am<b>Dowbo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:49pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:37pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 6:02pm<b>Fml_foreva</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:03pm

Fucked!<b>CanadiAnM8</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 3:21pm<b>shitidied</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 6:16am<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 4:39am<b>TheCookieComet</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 2:19am<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 12:37pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 8:38pm<b>quinzxl</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 8:49pm<b>lamyakh</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 12:45pm<b>irish_lad</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:34am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 1:51pm<b>firefox9778</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 8:55pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:30am<b>BlueDragonDC</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 11:28pm<b>Astrophysics</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:00pm<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 9:28pm<b>FlapJack1357</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 8:36pm<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:29pm<b>CurtisGirl</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 5:12am

DontClickOnMe's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of DontClickOnMe's badges

DontClickOnMe's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

#19984594
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25896) - you deserved it (2006)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27270) - you deserved it (2111)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27768) - you deserved it (12832)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML

#19982859
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24819) - you deserved it (1631)

On 07/25/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by arw - United States

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33594) - you deserved it (4705)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33594) - you deserved it (4705)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

#19981825
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22486) - you deserved it (4976)

On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

#19981576
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25903) - you deserved it (2129)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (2281)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, while trying to look cute and playing with my hair in front of a boy, I pulled a piece of my hair extension out. FML

#19974233
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7637) - you deserved it (44781)

On 07/22/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Roma-Jay - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28171) - you deserved it (3122)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

#19913171
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29733) - you deserved it (2997)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML

#19848904
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8997) - you deserved it (27611)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
407 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40550) - you deserved it (4323)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML

#19731019
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28881) - you deserved it (4207)

On 06/04/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by nanall - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: