About DontClickOnMe : You clicked on me. Oh my my my, are you gonna regret that. I guess your curiosity was just too much to handle, huh?
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DontClickOnMe's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom demanded that I go into the basement and fix the water heater. I told her that I had no idea how to fix it, so she threw my phone down the stairs, told me to Google it, and locked the basement door behind me. It's been two hours. FML
by MyMomIsInsane / 03/09/2015 at 8:28pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by mszoe / 03/01/2015 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML
by jynxisadouchebag / 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, my grandma rushed into my work and told my manager I had to leave due to a family emergency. Panicked, I ran to get my stuff and ran to the car. When I asked what had happened, she replied, "I needed someone to go see 50 Shades of Grey with me." FML
by Anonymous / 02/13/2015 at 8:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by SDCore / 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/09/2015 at 3:42pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by dogproblems / 01/27/2015 at 10:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
by fartje / 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm / Netherlands / Work
by Anonymous / 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, I went to a job interview. It was my last shot of getting a job before my savings run dry. It all went well until I was asked why I wanted to join the company. I got flustered and stuttered, "Because I um, I like money?" The guy gave me the most insincere "We'll be in touch." ever. FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2015 at 4:29pm / United States (Maine) / Work
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML
by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML
by ScottyB / 12/22/2014 at 3:05am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, my dad texted me saying he had "big news." I immediately called, thrilled, because I assumed he meant that he finally found a job and that our money troubles were over. The "big news" was him being excited at seeing an actor from one TV show he likes in another TV show. FML
by still poor / 12/05/2014 at 1:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
by Anonymous / 12/04/2014 at 10:29pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by Studying is for crazy people. / 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the… Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to…