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DntLookBack

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DntLookBack
  • Town/Country : New Jersey, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 October 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 873
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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DntLookBack's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

#2372451
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48716) - you deserved it (2782)

On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was walking in Walmart and this cute guy walked by me and winked. I thought he wanted to talk so I followed him around the store trying to catch up. Turns out it wasn't a wink, he had something in his eye. And he told the security person that a weird girl was stalking him. FML

#2156907
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8583) - you deserved it (35036)

On 05/21/2009 at 7:46pm - misc - by liz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I texted the hottest girl in the school saying, "I really like you, we should date". She responded with a text saying, "Sorry, I'm not into you." I then got a text saying, "Sorry, my brother stole my phone, and answered, but still it's no". I got rejected twice. Once by a man. FML

#1213141
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51699) - you deserved it (8264)

On 04/22/2009 at 12:09am - love - by misterhippo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (448999) - you deserved it (25560)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML

#1100061
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41221) - you deserved it (25398)

On 04/18/2009 at 9:55pm - misc - by pinkblankets (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
907 comments

I agree, your life sucks (329235) - you deserved it (35705)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
515 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227258) - you deserved it (29241)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went on Facebook to find that my little brother had messed with my profile. He wrote on my status that I'm a piece of shit, I have no life, and several other nasty and perverted things. Underneath, it said 26 of my friends liked this. I'm new to Facebook. So far I have 26 friends. FML

#492068
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51263) - you deserved it (7242)

On 03/20/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by noname (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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