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Dlzq

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Dlzq

10Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 417
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Dlzq : Hey,
16 y/o kid.
I'm just here to have a laugh once in a while. If you want, just hmu, I love talking to new people.

Dlzq's page activity

Visits<b>bellles</b> - 17 hours ago<b>alyssablack2012</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 3:27pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 10:09am<b>cutycat136</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 6:01am<b>arasx0</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:04am<b>gis0392</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 9:06pm<b>gtiffany53</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:54pm<b>JokerPajamas</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 9:42am<b>BBlah</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 6:29am<b>thatsbs123</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 7:46pm<b>EskimoCallboy22</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 12:35am<b>_Rachel_2008</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 2:56am<b>asian_short_girl</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 12:31pm<b>chips0843</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 6:16am<b>KhazKhazz</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 4:26am<b>DubiousDude69</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 2:26am<b>rebphil18</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 8:29am<b>IceMan11</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 3:20am

Liked!<b>gtiffany53</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:54pm<b>my_horrible_life</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 11:09pm<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 7:32pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:52pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 2:55am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 2:34pm<b>chips0843</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 10:31am<b>rubymonroe</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 4:47am<b>kayzers</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:00am<b>summer135790</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 12:20am

Dlzq's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Dlzq's badges

Dlzq's favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

#21363391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27381) - you deserved it (3144)

On 02/25/2015 at 4:39pm - intimacy - by Fuck - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was the day my catheter was to be removed. The nurse removing it deflated the balloon, and then tried pulling it out. After me screaming in extreme pain, she found out she hadn't actually deflated the balloon all the way. She was trying to pull a small balloon through my dick hole. FML

#21362632
112 comments

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26644) - you deserved it (15612)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, my obsessive stalker of an ex found my girlfriend on Facebook and sent her a message saying just ":)". For some reason I'll never understand, she took this as a sign that I'd just slept with my ex. Now I'm single, and my ex is probably planning her next move. FML

#21324775
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31459) - you deserved it (2280)

On 12/26/2014 at 4:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

#21276472
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36996) - you deserved it (4739)

On 10/12/2014 at 8:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML

#21276185
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34116) - you deserved it (3778)

On 10/12/2014 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by KO - United States

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

#17131113
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35563) - you deserved it (5495)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, while shopping with my mother, she handed me a frozen turkey to put in the cart, but ended up swinging it into my nuts instead. I feel like a giant battered eggplant, and I think I'm now impotent. FML

#8774277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19816) - you deserved it (2973)

On 03/02/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by beateneggs - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a driver stole the parking space I was about to pull into. I politely asked him to move. He had a go at me, so I kick his car twice, in front of a few witnesses. The car is fine. I ripped two ligaments in my foot and I'll have a cast for a month. FML

#507
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6666) - you deserved it (35033)

On 12/13/2008 at 7:06am - misc - by Kikinovak - Sent from mobile version



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