Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DjeePee

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

DjeePee

111Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 October 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 21469
  • Number of comments : 2201
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DjeePee : I'm DjeePee - not my real name, d'uh - and I live a pretty boring life, with books, series (Dexter, Game of Thrones, Friends, The Walking Dead, Rome), some cups of tea, regular visits to the flea market and museums, lots of antiques, some cats and the dream of having a place of my own.

Last words here: no, English is not my native language.
Really last words here: I can't write short comments.

DjeePee's page activity

Visits<b>vincentjules</b> - 7 minutes ago<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - 4 hours ago<b>kanyevevo</b> - yesterday at 2:15am<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - yesterday at 12:03am<b>fxmd</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 4:38pm<b>moodyreallyrocks</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 1:50pm<b>mistykitten</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 7:25am<b>Adolf_Hipster13</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:04am<b>joeyl2008</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 9:01am<b>weird_adult</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 1:48pm<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:47pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:29am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:02pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:07am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 5:11am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 2:24pm<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 3:28pm<b>TwentyFourXXIV</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 9:18am

Fucked!<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - just now<b>fxmd</b> - yesterday at 10:38pm<b>Adolf_Hipster13</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 6:04am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 1:54am<b>b5b0n36</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 4:45am<b>countryguy91290</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 6:06am<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:36am<b>elimited</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 9:08am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:21pm<b>Repethetic</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 4:27pm<b>labe145</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 1:16pm<b>bagelbaron</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 10:36pm<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 6:35am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 8:44am<b>Tenker</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:49am<b>xyris</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 3:55am<b>whynotbliss</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:52pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 8:36am

DjeePee's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of DjeePee's badges

DjeePee's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

#14524101
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35449) - you deserved it (3600)

On 01/09/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by curlyisnogood -

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

#14058038
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67615) - you deserved it (5333)

On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -

Today, my boyfriend bailed on our one year anniversary celebration because his ex girlfriend asked him to go to a wedding with her and pose as her fake boyfriend. FML

#13733818
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42344) - you deserved it (3945)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:52am - love - by iheartexes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML

#13430333
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36172) - you deserved it (2910)

On 10/13/2010 at 2:18am - love - by failure (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told the girl I've been seeing for a while about the strong feelings that I have for her and that I was falling in love. She told me my words made her realize what it felt like to be in love. My words were so powerful, in fact, that she ran right back into the arms of her ex boyfriend. FML

#13331586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38495) - you deserved it (3545)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14442) - you deserved it (28655)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

#12760106
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36953) - you deserved it (3547)

On 08/26/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML

#12376475
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43872) - you deserved it (3056)

On 08/07/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML

#12261661
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9955) - you deserved it (36600)

On 08/02/2010 at 5:50am - work - by Julia (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I was talking to an ex who I still love. He told me how much he wanted to see me, how much he missed me, and we started talking about when we could spend the day at his house. I mentioned Saturday, and he said, "I can't, I have to take my fiancée to the doctor's to find out our baby's sex." FML

#8954955
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32157) - you deserved it (7709)

On 03/09/2010 at 8:17pm - love - by littlemissgullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

#8916376
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32939) - you deserved it (2846)

On 03/08/2010 at 9:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom called asking for advice on how to flirt with her personal trainer. I thought she was joking and asked her what Dad would think. Turns out they're getting divorced. They decided this three weeks ago. No one told me. FML

#8396917
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29952) - you deserved it (1951)

On 02/18/2010 at 1:06am - misc - by ApparentlyEmo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my dad decides to tell me he's taking the whole family to disney world, even my step-brother's girlfriend. But not me, because he can't "afford" it. FML

#8232410
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41790) - you deserved it (2321)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:49am - kids - by disneyworld (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while cleaning around the house, I found a black bra that wasn’t mine. I confronted my husband about it, which turned into a massive fight. It turned out that the bra actually belonged to my son’s girlfriend I didn’t know he had. FML

#8088886
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14433) - you deserved it (28874)

On 02/10/2010 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - Lebanon (Beyrouth)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: