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DistanceRunner94

Offline (the 01/10/2016 at 2:25pm) | Search for a member

DistanceRunner94

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 December 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1508
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DistanceRunner94 : I like to run.

DistanceRunner94's page activity

Visits<b>isodontgetit</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 4:13pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:44pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 11:26pm<b>Omer98</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 11:15pm<b>jen1682</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 12:33am<b>Pwib</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 2:50am<b>lilmisstif</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 2:14am<b>orenjeo</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 7:54pm<b>FistBlaster9000</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 11:40pm<b>missnewmomma</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 10:19pm<b>samm12099</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 6:54pm<b>aaron5121</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 4:35pm<b>VasNormandy</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 4:15pm<b>King_paradox</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 2:38pm<b>Linda_zlk</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 5:41am<b>Lexii6789</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 9:56am<b>niftyismybitch</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 1:07pm

DistanceRunner94's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of DistanceRunner94's badges

DistanceRunner94's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I said I wouldn't find her attractive in 20 years. What I actually said was that I wouldn't sleep with her mother now, who happens to be 20 years older than her. FML

#21460448
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24438) - you deserved it (3127)

On 08/25/2015 at 7:55am - love - by Shelling Ford - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, I was unaware that me losing my virginity was also breakup sex. FML

#21460101
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31413) - you deserved it (2982)

On 08/24/2015 at 2:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

#21459977
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20337) - you deserved it (8670)

On 08/24/2015 at 4:46am - misc - by Annie (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my husband and I locked our keys in the car. Our only spare is in the drawer with all our sex toys. So we either had to get our oldest go in the drawer and get them to bring to us or walk the 12 miles home. My feet will never recover from that walk. FML

#21459919
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18435) - you deserved it (24808)

On 08/24/2015 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I decided to upgrade to Windows 10. I wanted to keep my old files on the current hard drive, I clicked on the keep old files option. Thanks to Windows, I lost everything. FML

#21459683
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22288) - you deserved it (5420)

On 08/23/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Arrkyna (man) -

Today, after nearly 2 years, my now ex-girlfriend decided she was ready to have sex. Specifically, sex with my dad. FML

#21459616
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28197) - you deserved it (1759)

On 08/23/2015 at 9:45am - love - by pontwa (man) - Australia

Today, even after explaining to my boyfriend that I was self conscious about my breasts because they're slightly misshaped, he still persisted with begging me for a tit pic, saying he would still see me as beautiful. I gave in and sent one. He responded with "LOL WHAT ARE THOOOOOOSSSEE." FML

#21459438
164 comments

Today, my period started again. I just finished a 17-day period 3 days ago. FML

#21459211
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30856) - you deserved it (1982)

On 08/22/2015 at 6:47am - health - by period pains - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my husband wanted to use bacon grease as lube. FML

#21459209
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24551) - you deserved it (7688)

On 08/22/2015 at 6:18am - intimacy - by fuck no (woman) - India (Kerala)

Today, my wife accused me of cheating. Why? Because I recently started working out, and according to her, no married man tries to improve his physique unless he's trying to look good for other women. I can't believe I married this neurotic wreck. FML

#21459202
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23620) - you deserved it (4441)

On 08/22/2015 at 5:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I woke up from a dream in which my girlfriend gave birth to a litter of puppies. I can't even look at her now without getting nauseous. FML

#21459180
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23522) - you deserved it (2883)

On 08/22/2015 at 3:30am - animals - by yooitscallo (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered "Fucking tryhard." FML

#21459168
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24115) - you deserved it (3193)

On 08/22/2015 at 2:58am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML

#21459115
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26216) - you deserved it (3761)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:59pm - love - by cuckoo (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10616) - you deserved it (31420)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)



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