DeadxManxWalking

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DeadxManxWalking

25Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17191
  • Number of comments : 715
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About DeadxManxWalking : "I am the same as you, a dead man walking on the surface of the earth."

Hi, my name is Malik. I enjoy meeting new people and making people laugh and smile. I LOVE wolves, music, and video games.

DeadxManxWalking's page activity

Visits<b>holliepryce1</b> - 24 hours ago<b>meowimmakat</b> - yesterday at 1:42am<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 3:31pm<b>darnellq</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 7:16am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 10:41pm<b>unadultfangirl</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 3:04am<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 11:35pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 1:20am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 2:55am<b>draketv</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 3:29pm<b>k1tten</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 12:18am<b>Itineranthuman</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 4:54pm<b>princessshaybaby</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 2:49am<b>pretzelpirate</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 9:49pm<b>poppunkette</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 4:47pm<b>BoneCollector</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 1:34pm<b>justarandomalien</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 1:05pm<b>justaregularmon</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 10:29am

Fucked!<b>unadultfangirl</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 9:04am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 8:55am<b>princessshaybaby</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 8:49am<b>Dexter_39476</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:42pm<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 5:07am<b>YDISM</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 7:43pm<b>psychoIogical</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:49am<b>399</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:59pm<b>delichick</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:26am<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 8:13pm<b>3051628</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:09pm<b>Echo13243</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 9:27pm<b>USMC10Rex12451</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 12:18am<b>screamogirl123</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:59pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:31am<b>French_giirl</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 6:36pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:23am<b>TheEdge00</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 10:23pm

DeadxManxWalking's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of DeadxManxWalking's badges

DeadxManxWalking's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents decided to "discipline" my kitten by spraying her with water. This somehow managed to completely un-train her, and now she's back to being the compulsive biter she was when I first brought her home. FML

by scars / 12/16/2014 at 10:01am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML

by juggalomurderer59 / 11/12/2014 at 11:00am / United States / Health

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

by sushipanda9 / 10/20/2014 at 8:07pm / United States (Florida) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

by mykodu / 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

by hahaohyeahwow / 09/24/2014 at 12:24am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2014 at 2:44am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

by FANZZY / 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

by jackie89 / 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Intimacy

Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML

Today, my boyfriend bought yet another video game and played it all afternoon. Unlike me, our parrot is taking this situation rather well: for the past two hours he's been repeating, over and over, "EA Sports, it's in the game." FML

by Apcn / 06/05/2014 at 4:05pm / France (Bretagne) / Animals

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

by stupiddog / 04/15/2014 at 8:08am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was given a call home, a 3-day-suspension, and a week of detention in school for a "serious violation of the code of conduct." Said violation? Jogging in the middle of the hall. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2014 at 7:24pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2014 at 7:34am / United States / Kids

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2014 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous