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Dave_Davington

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Dave_Davington
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 148
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Dave_Davington's last visitors

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Dave_Davington's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Dave_Davington's badges

Dave_Davington's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream that I was playing fetch with my dog. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't woken up to the sound of my phone smashing against the wall. FML

#20983492
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36214) - you deserved it (3955)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:58am - misc - by jessierules93 - United States (California)

Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML

#20823903
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54472) - you deserved it (4093)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:07pm - kids - by benjo - United States

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

#20818422
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57598) - you deserved it (5667)

On 08/03/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by zackeryburch - United States (California)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49428) - you deserved it (7867)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML

#20812086
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46080) - you deserved it (5090)

On 07/30/2013 at 7:19pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

#20762710
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42973) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43217) - you deserved it (3314)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9356) - you deserved it (32988)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28923) - you deserved it (3646)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my eight-year-old son thought that if he swallowed soap, his farts would smell like soap. The smell of vomit and diarrhea now permeating my house is proof of how wrong he was. FML

#19680165
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17741) - you deserved it (1554)

On 05/25/2012 at 8:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

#17960202
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31088) - you deserved it (7760)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:06pm - intimacy - by margelover (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27363) - you deserved it (8523)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)



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