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DarksMoon

Offline (the 10/11/2014 at 5:38am) | Search for a member

DarksMoon

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  • Number of visits : 223
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DarksMoon's favorite FMLs

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30201) - you deserved it (3835)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

#21268936
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19587) - you deserved it (40160)

On 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm - misc - by ThatNewCarSmell (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37147) - you deserved it (3701)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31765) - you deserved it (18267)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42148) - you deserved it (11740)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

#21068134
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50832) - you deserved it (9301)

On 02/22/2014 at 12:39am - intimacy - by awkward (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML

#20997702
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51903) - you deserved it (4487)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51105) - you deserved it (5331)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML

#19812569
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22949) - you deserved it (15201)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Shelby - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the point of orgasm, my boyfriend screamed out, "Is this all there is?!" then rolled over and stared blankly at the ceiling without speaking for ages. This happens a lot. FML

#18335372
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35824) - you deserved it (5618)

On 11/24/2011 at 8:57am - intimacy - by Jane (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I met up with an old high school friend who I used to make fun of because he put so much effort into his studies. Turns out he makes my annual salary in a month. FML

#14322197
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7483) - you deserved it (87217)

On 12/24/2010 at 10:12am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

#13351667
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46190) - you deserved it (14721)

On 10/07/2010 at 2:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML

#10777630
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10463) - you deserved it (36856)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:35pm - misc - by noraidk - United States (Texas)

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

#2271321
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80765) - you deserved it (5015)

On 05/25/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at work at a local hot dog chain. A child (about 10, who I've seen there before) came in to order food for his Dad. He orders very excitedly, and I told him he'd be a great worker here when he gets older. He said "oh no, my Dad says I'm too smart to work in a place like this." FML

#850361
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55886) - you deserved it (12524)

On 04/07/2009 at 8:50am - work - by GT716 (man) - United States (New York)



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