Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DarkSighty

Search for a member

DarkSighty
  • Town/Country : Ludhiana, India
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 2 October 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 428
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

DarkSighty's last visitors

JoshTheTacoManoreily12PancakeSlapdachaykeLickitungJrDark__Angel66ZoeythedinosaurWizardojaxstangReignInBloodRockUntilYouDiebuckdharma

DarkSighty's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of DarkSighty's badges

DarkSighty's favorite FMLs

Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML

#13560342
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34093) - you deserved it (9242)

On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML

#12693453
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7687) - you deserved it (66089)

On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

#12051058
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30117) - you deserved it (13575)

On 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I went on a first date, where my date managed to fall in a creek, take me to his house and measure my height, show me family pictures, and perform the Soulja Boy dance in his living room. All while wearing swim trunks because his pants were drying and he didn't have extras. FML

#10727772
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (5679)

On 05/24/2010 at 2:13am - love - by gedderdunn - Reserved

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16246) - you deserved it (24216)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend and I were in my basement. I play drums and guitar very well. My girlfriend bet me $50 that she could play better than me. I made the bet, but what I didn't know was that she had been taking both drum and guitar lessons since she was 5. I just lost $50. FML

#7732713
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6436) - you deserved it (37785)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:54am - love - by unknown - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32004) - you deserved it (15289)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29023) - you deserved it (6666)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating lunch out side with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#6795519
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29371) - you deserved it (2443)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:43pm - animals - by ollierocks96 - United States (Florida)

Today, I come home to find that my dog has taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He also took a dump in my house shoe. FML

#6787921
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24354) - you deserved it (3807)

On 12/17/2009 at 1:09am - animals - by life_suxxx - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML

#6753136
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30250) - you deserved it (1625)

On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25409) - you deserved it (11332)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

#6528264
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (12100)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a my neighbor being mugged on the street. I wanted to help, so I tried to yank her purse from the mugger's hands. I guess my neighbor didn't see me clearly, because she thought I was another mugger and kicked my directly in the happy sacks. FML

#6452828
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25299) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at a petting zoo with my boyfriend. A guy that worked there said he'd take a picture of me with a mouse on my head. He reassured me that this mouse was trained. I agreed. Once the mouse got on my head, it peed. Turns out the guy didn't work there after all. FML

#6212555
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22350) - you deserved it (13023)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:14pm - health - by Poopyhead (woman) - Ireland (Cork)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: