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Dakota27

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Dakota27
  • Town/Country : Portland, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 July 1987 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 919
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Dakota27's last visitors

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Dakota27's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Dakota27's badges

Dakota27's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

#17487537
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25461) - you deserved it (3144)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31698) - you deserved it (2552)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47159) - you deserved it (3113)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41443) - you deserved it (2611)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48864) - you deserved it (9568)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34608) - you deserved it (9282)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33936) - you deserved it (5071)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, I went to visit my great grandma. I saw that her dog had this red fluid on his ear, so I asked my grandma about it. She said she put red finger nail-polish in his ear so she could tell the difference between 'all' of her dogs. She only has one dog. FML

#16967772
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25673) - you deserved it (2045)

On 07/04/2011 at 12:13am - animals - by emegemerald - United States

Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML

#16965226
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37893) - you deserved it (2417)

On 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by beablue18 - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher didn't make the glasses shrink, I'd bought smaller glasses. FML

#16812577
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28981) - you deserved it (5533)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:53am - kids - by wow - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

#16126147
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57566) - you deserved it (4485)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:17am - intimacy - by Chels (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

#16111530
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25053) - you deserved it (6322)

On 05/09/2011 at 10:34pm - kids - by richkief76 -

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

#15962479
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43035) - you deserved it (4651)

On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

#15896173
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28180) - you deserved it (3958)

On 04/23/2011 at 9:11am - health - by cdn_steed - United States (New York)

Today, while enjoying a nice dinner out, I observed a homeless man giggling hysterically to himself while wiping boogers on my bike seat and handlebars. FML

#15844059
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26510) - you deserved it (2542)

On 04/19/2011 at 4:23am - misc - by BerkeleyBiker (woman) - United States (California)



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