DQEight

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Offline (the 12/15/2015 at 5:33am)

DQEight

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1029
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About DQEight : I don't usually get personal messages.I frequent reddit and Im trying for a degree in networking. I love video games!

DQEight's page activity

Visits<b>HeavyWeaponsGuy</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 10:49am<b>Vegan_Cannibal</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 11:06pm<b>Anonymist</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 10:16pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 5:28am<b>fukcyuo</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:01pm<b>hoeslikedicks</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:31am<b>AlienZ8</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:06pm<b>Mysterion345</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 3:04am<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 9:24am<b>AnimeAddict95</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 12:42am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 2:58am<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 11/15/2011 at 12:11am

Fucked!<b>HeavyWeaponsGuy</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 4:49pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 10:28am

DQEight's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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DQEight's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML

by Kwalker3 / 05/06/2012 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

by ShadowJack / 04/29/2012 at 11:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:24am / United States / Love

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

by intheairtonight / 04/25/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML

by andromeda80 / 03/28/2012 at 9:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I sneezed while I was in the middle of getting a root canal. I managed to warn the dentist that I was going to sneeze, but he didn't manage to get the tools out of my mouth in time. FML

by Anon / 02/17/2012 at 3:43pm / United States / Health

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

by DarkDolly / 02/04/2012 at 11:39am / France / Transportation

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML

by lolwut / 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML

by Dani / 01/12/2012 at 5:35am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML

by liLbob6598 / 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy