Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/24/2015 at 5:35pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 March 1987 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2018
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Ctrl_H : I don't know how to have casual conversation. You think you're talking about one thing, and either you are and it's incredibly boring, or you're not because it's subtext and you need a decoder ring.

Ctrl_H's page activity

Visits<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:47pm<b>rabbiddog</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:43pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:21pm<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 2:55am<b>deathpotato</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 3:21pm<b>moneymuffen</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:06am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 12:35pm<b>mayacat</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:34pm<b>Apollo182</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:17pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:43pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:39am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:12pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 9:09am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 11:38pm<b>jajajanie</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:50am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 8:58am<b>drunk_in_love</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:57am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 2:03am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 8:21pm

Ctrl_H's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Ctrl_H's badges

Ctrl_H's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41791) - you deserved it (4071)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States

Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50077) - you deserved it (4154)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:20am - health - by those_allergies - United States (Oregon)

Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52217) - you deserved it (6064)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:19pm - kids - by failure as a parent (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65924) - you deserved it (12931)

On 05/07/2013 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Sirah90 (woman) - United States

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML


I agree, your life sucks (71592) - you deserved it (10625)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML


I agree, your life sucks (62626) - you deserved it (3645)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I offered to pay my boyfriend to buy me flowers. He still refused. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42501) - you deserved it (15718)

On 04/11/2013 at 12:53am - love - by flowerging (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37576) - you deserved it (6693)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: