CrystalCrew124

Search for a member

Offline (the 02/23/2015 at 12:47pm)

CrystalCrew124

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1021
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CrystalCrew124 : Games, LOTR, The Hobbit, i dont do much oops. Introvert.

CrystalCrew124's page activity

Visits<b>WildHorses1987</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 11:01am<b>SpeedRacer20</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 8:56am<b>chr1sF</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:54pm<b>whynotbliss</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 10:25pm<b>1stones</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 12:04am<b>davidxflow</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:58am<b>Awesomegasm</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:13pm<b>StraightKing</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:32am<b>therealjc</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:52pm<b>hatebreeder666</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 7:16am<b>lefartface</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 7:30pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 9:11pm<b>Adm_Twigs</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:11pm<b>huskies8</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 11:05pm<b>rob02</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 2:14pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 8:29pm<b>timotay89</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:56am<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 11:05pm

CrystalCrew124's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of CrystalCrew124's badges

CrystalCrew124's favorite FMLs

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

by cunning glassist / 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2014 at 11:09am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend's cat for staring at me, then cried about it for an hour. Pregnancy life. FML

by alii2349 / 02/10/2014 at 10:16pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals

Today, I was waiting in line at a clothes store when someone cut in in front of me, and the gentlemen in front of me. I shouted, "Hey! Queue starts back here!". He responded by pointing out the "gentlemen" in front was actually a very realistic mannequin. FML

by QueueJumper / 02/10/2014 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I burned my right boob. I got it by eating a hot pocket and accidentally spilling the extremely hot filling. I never thought I'd get laid before. This has just confirmed it. FML

by Nikia818 / 02/06/2014 at 1:23pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

Today, for our anniversary, I sang my boyfriend a heartfelt, self-written song. The first thing he said when I finished was "Your fly is open." FML

by zippersaremoreimportantthansentiments / 02/01/2014 at 3:11am / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2014 at 7:34am / United States / Kids

Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML

by welp, time to become an assassin / 06/23/2013 at 2:14pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the smell of chlorine has started to turn me on, probably because my girlfriend has an indoor pool in her house. Guess who works as a swim instructor. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2013 at 12:08pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2011 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

by Anon / 05/07/2011 at 2:08am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Intimacy

Today, at my wedding, my brother decided it would be funny to trip me as I was walking down the aisle, in front of hundreds of people. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

by anonymous / 09/03/2010 at 1:05am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, someone thought it would be funny to switch the signs on the bathroom doors. Fortunately, I knew which was the men's and went on in. The startled old woman inside, however, did not. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2010 at 2:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous