Cristian89

Search for a member

Cristian89

12Fucked!

Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Covina, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8131
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs 😄
Add me on SnapChat : chinchilla.89

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>leafynitemare</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 5:28am<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 10:31pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 2:21am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 6:51pm<b>2simz</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:44am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 12:19am<b>EddySaBoy</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 4:56am<b>badassmf1234</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 10:45pm<b>nadiabjensen</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 6:27pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 9:26am<b>usedername</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:05pm<b>SWhimsynBubbaS</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:05am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:54am<b>RedCronos</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 2:33am<b>StarDust5921</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 11:22pm<b>HeyyShayy</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:11pm<b>mineller</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 5:00pm<b>shady914</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 12:20am

Fucked!<b>usedername</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 3:05am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:29am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:08am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:25pm<b>KVYLV</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:15am<b>marthagayo</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:22am<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:19pm<b>nofreeusernames</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:41am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2013 at 2:56am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

by f.a.t. / 10/04/2013 at 4:20am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML

by Sooz / 10/02/2013 at 9:18pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML

by Sooz / 10/02/2013 at 9:18pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend called me a selfish bitch and dumped me after I told him I'm planning on getting much-needed breast reduction surgery. FML

by Ggirl / 10/01/2013 at 3:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 6:30am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

by -___- / 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

by :( / 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

by Christian / 09/28/2013 at 11:21am / United States / Love

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:08am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML

by ihatethisjob / 09/27/2013 at 4:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was showing my 6-year-old son how easy and safe it is to ride a bike. I didn't notice a pebble, bust up my leg and my son is now terrified of bicycles. FML

by NoBikesForYou / 09/26/2013 at 6:56pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Kids