Cristian89

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Cristian89

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Cristian89
  • Town/Country : Covina, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8584
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs 😄
Add me on SnapChat : chinchilla.89

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>jeremyesgirl</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 10:30pm<b>LethalSeamonkey</b> - the 10/27/2016 at 12:30pm<b>hannah_nana109</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 4:34pm<b>monkeysee21</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:36am<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 9:24am<b>leafynitemare</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 5:28am<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 10:31pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 2:21am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 6:51pm<b>2simz</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:44am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 12:19am<b>EddySaBoy</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 4:56am<b>badassmf1234</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 10:45pm<b>nadiabjensen</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 6:27pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 9:26am<b>usedername</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:05pm<b>SWhimsynBubbaS</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:05am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:54am

Fucked!<b>usedername</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 3:05am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:29am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:08am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:25pm<b>KVYLV</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:15am<b>marthagayo</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:22am<b>nikkichanxoxo</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:19pm<b>nofreeusernames</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:41am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:22am<b>KurlyQ</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:56am<b>miliaras93</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:34am

Cristian89's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, while feeling sick, I decided to go to a furniture store to sit down for a few minutes. I'm now the proud owner of an expensive, vomit-stained recliner. FML

by maxhhh / 11/16/2013 at 1:19am / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

by CanWeAllGetOne / 11/13/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I went for our 20 week scan and found out we're having a girl. The first thing he said to me was, "The next one better be a boy or I'm leaving you". FML

by Naomi / 11/10/2013 at 5:28am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

by barebackingit / 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

by Argh / 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm / France (Poitou-Charentes) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

by KittyKat / 11/03/2013 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Kids

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

by PapaW / 11/01/2013 at 3:01am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

by catfan / 10/30/2013 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm / Zimbabwe / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

by NOKHAN / 10/25/2013 at 1:17pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I found out through one of my friends that my boyfriend cheated on me. He says it doesn't count as cheating because he couldn't get it up. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2013 at 3:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend sent me a nude picture. I would have been fine with it if he hadn't taken it in his ex-girlfriend's room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/19/2013 at 1:34am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

by highlydisgusted / 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love