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Crazynocatlady

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Crazynocatlady

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 March 1982 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 955
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Crazynocatlady's page activity

Visits<b>TreyA</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 10:19am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 4:52pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 1:07pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 2:41pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 1:14pm<b>DanCastellaneta</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 9:23am<b>Tannasgh</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:25pm<b>katejewels14</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:22am<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:49pm<b>sinistral</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 12:48pm<b>aaron44</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:50am<b>Mornai</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:20pm<b>MollySheridan</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:43am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:35am<b>Dave_Davington</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 7:31am<b>groovy579</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:21pm<b>ssdd25</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 11:28am<b>iti</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:40pm

Crazynocatlady's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Crazynocatlady's badges

Crazynocatlady's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML

#21509335
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23278) - you deserved it (4809)

On 12/30/2015 at 10:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally felt ready to lose my virginity with my boyfriend. Unfortunately he was too embarrassed to go and buy some condoms, and suggested in all seriousness that we use a sandwich bag instead. FML

#21495119
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27549) - you deserved it (3535)

On 11/21/2015 at 9:54am - intimacy - by angelisa (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I slipped in my own vomit while dashing to the bathroom to puke. My knee hit and shattered the toilet; the toilet shattered my knee. FML

Today, I was walking to a job interview. I needed to get rid of some gum but there were no trash cans in sight, so I spat it out on the ground. Next thing I know, some guy grabs me, sticks the gum in my hair, and walks off, muttering curses. I couldn't get it out in time for the interview. FML

#21234860
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21903) - you deserved it (48993)

On 08/11/2014 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I went surfing, got a few rides, then realized I had my phone in my pocket. FML

#21216262
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39795) - you deserved it (25243)

On 07/21/2014 at 1:14pm - misc - by surfer - United States (New York)

Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML

#21208337
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38268) - you deserved it (9304)

On 07/13/2014 at 10:10pm - animals - by dogggg (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52808) - you deserved it (7949)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend found a movie he loved on Netflix. He was so excited to show it to me and was certain I'd love it. I didn't have the heart to tell him what I really thought of White Chicks. FML

#21148492
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39202) - you deserved it (9974)

On 05/22/2014 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a date for the first time since my divorce was finalized a year ago. The first question the guy asked me was what my favorite sex position is. FML

#21135207
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52660) - you deserved it (6302)

On 05/09/2014 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by CEO - United States (Virginia)

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

#21133607
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41221) - you deserved it (6037)

On 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by BaggedDown (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not to grope me. He responded by throwing his bedpan at me. It was full. FML

#21130965
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45679) - you deserved it (3885)

On 05/04/2014 at 10:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was told that I'm very likely to win the "Most Likely to Exceed 5 Cats" yearbook award. My best friend said, "They wanted it to be 'Most Likely to Die Alone', but it was a bit harsh". Someone else added, "It's still pretty likely, though". FML

#21128889
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44173) - you deserved it (4297)

On 05/02/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML

#21128831
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44348) - you deserved it (3390)

On 05/02/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by thanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML

#21100221
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46057) - you deserved it (3730)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40542) - you deserved it (5349)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)



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