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CraftierBOB

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CraftierBOB

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 327
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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CraftierBOB's page activity

Visits<b>melinal</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:44pm

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CraftierBOB's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo, because she loves tigers. Correction: she used to love tigers, until one sprayed urine on her from a distance of four meters. FML

#21458732
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21353) - you deserved it (5037)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I turned in an essay about a book I'd read over the summer. My teacher later called me to her desk and began to gush about how interesting the book sounded and asked to borrow my copy. The book I wrote about is not real, and the main characters are named after my childhood pets. FML

#21458720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20383) - you deserved it (14463)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by technicallywroteabook (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

#21310320
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29950) - you deserved it (5333)

On 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm - animals - by allykat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to sit through yet another one of my mom's, "You need to grow and gain some weight!" rants. I'm 22 and she doesn't believe me when I tell her I'm done growing. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting past 5'2". FML

#21223478
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43094) - you deserved it (3607)

On 07/29/2014 at 4:27am - misc - by Tiny (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my dad asked me how I would feel about going on an all-expenses-paid, month-long holiday to the Caribbean. I was ecstatic and broke into tears of joy, saying I'd love it. He replied, "Yeah, me too. Shame it ain't happening!" then left for work, laughing his arse off. FML

#21220536
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45480) - you deserved it (8692)

On 07/25/2014 at 6:46pm - misc - by xXshitface4uXx (woman) - New Zealand (Bay of Plenty)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37879) - you deserved it (12644)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42335) - you deserved it (15831)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML

#21134881
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39278) - you deserved it (3512)

On 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by fmlgirl (woman) - Netherlands (Zeeland)

Today, I didn't pay enough attention while sending a music file to be used in a powerful video my class-mates and I made about the Syrian civil war. Instead of a moving classical track, viewers were shown graphic scenes of devastation to the tune of Gangnam Style. FML

#21128082
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24193) - you deserved it (35089)

On 05/01/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by Mortifiedcharityworker (woman) - Austria

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49756) - you deserved it (4537)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

#21099560
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44085) - you deserved it (18835)

On 03/29/2014 at 5:57pm - love - by the other guy? (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48944) - you deserved it (3899)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

#20520443
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33502) - you deserved it (4986)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by stillfuckingcrying (woman) - Sweden (Kalmar Lan)



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