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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 August 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2291
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Contravene : I'm not really one for self-description. If you really want to know anything about me, just ask.

Contravene's page activity

Visits<b>cole_108</b> - the 08/29/2016 at 7:22pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 1:37pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:53pm<b>thaliah</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 11:55am<b>Kalipczo</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 5:27am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 3:58pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 10:46pm<b>tralala453</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 2:47pm<b>iLynz</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 10:20pm<b>capslockisgood</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 12:52am<b>JinxedPixie</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:19pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 1:25pm<b>Dreamer4094</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 2:44pm<b>arsenicalhumor</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 9:26pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 6:49pm<b>hulioverede</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 6:10pm<b>mattdlv</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 12:23am<b>XistingPrince</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 10:39pm

Contravene's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Contravene's badges

Contravene's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 1:26am / Health

Today, I decided to mock a few stuck-up runners by effortlessly jumping over the track hurdles. The last one was the easiest. The easiest to crush my balls on, and twist my ankle up in the process. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2011 at 2:50am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I realized that even though I was an honor student throughout school, and considered the golden child who was going to go far in life, all I've accomplished a year after graduation is becoming an unemployed single mother still living with my parents. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2011 at 7:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML

by Username / 03/28/2011 at 1:26am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

by phantomdriver / 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML

by fffmmll / 03/21/2011 at 12:58pm / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend bought several bottles of Potassium Iodine pills and a gas mask, due to the radiation scare from Japan. We live in Texas. FML

by radiationkillz / 03/21/2011 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2011 at 11:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, my parents thought it would be appropriate to tell my girlfriend that I used to stick my penis in a sock puppet and talk to it when I was younger. FML

by HotAsTits / 03/20/2011 at 4:31pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, my dog had to choose between protecting me from a mugger or eating an apple. He chose the apple. FML

by mugged / 03/20/2011 at 4:29pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, at the age of 16, I'm recovering from hip surgery. My friends took me out to the movies to cheer me up. They thought it would be hilarious to steal my crutches and leave me stranded and alone in the mall, multiple times. It wasn't. FML

by crutchy / 03/20/2011 at 11:03am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML

by embarassed / 03/20/2011 at 12:26am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids