Search for a member

Offline (the 09/22/2016 at 4:48am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 23189
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cocoapelli : I'm a white collared working argonaut

Cocoapelli's page activity

Visits<b>BryantStone</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 12:16am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 4:04pm<b>paris_ava</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 4:41pm<b>TJBMX</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 4:18pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:48am<b>LilyLi</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:26pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:09pm<b>I_Bite</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:59pm<b>hasooon</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 4:33pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 8:55pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 12:40pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:11pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 10:45pm<b>deebiedoobie</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 10:42pm

Fucked!<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 8:20am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 6:40pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 5:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 4:45am

Cocoapelli's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Cocoapelli's badges

Cocoapelli's favorite FMLs

Today, I eavesdropped as my friend tried hinting to my crush that I like him. He replied, "Haha, eww. She looks like a fuckin' garden gnome." FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2016 at 12:33pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I bought a new phone. It's shock proof, water proof, you name it. Just not kitten proof, it seems. That's $400 down the drain. FML

by jshum / 09/13/2016 at 11:02am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, I was on a business trip with a co-worker. We had to wait for the train, so I decided to browse a store in the train station while he waited outside. I then got a message on my cell phone, from my co-worker saying, "You are somewhere on this train, right?" FML

by Rabite / 09/13/2016 at 7:22am / Germany / Transportation

Today, after evicting my roommate for excessively not abiding by the lease agreements, he thought he could get back at me by sending me a video of my sister giving him head. FML

by livingonmyownfromnowon / 09/13/2016 at 2:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, as I was walking up to a urinal I heard a small hiss. I looked up just in time to get an eye full of chemicals from the automatic air freshener. I rinsed my eye out and went back to the urinal. It happened again. FML

by el_Jeffe_D / 09/11/2016 at 12:05pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

by Loud / 09/08/2016 at 2:07am / Australia / Work

Today, I finally decided to accept a date proposal from a guy who's had a crush on me for years. I got into his car, and it smelled strongly of my middle school perfume. I went into his bedroom and saw my middle school class photos hanging everywhere. Let's just say I ran home that night. FML

by hannamacintosh / 07/07/2016 at 2:37pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I didn't have the courage to tell the guy who likes me that I only thought of him as a friend, so I asked my best friend to do it for me. It turns out that her way of doing this is telling him to "fuck off" and then punching him in the face. FML

by ShouldHaveDoneItMyself / 07/05/2016 at 1:04pm / Sudan / Miscellaneous

Today, as a dentist, I was performing simple tooth extraction when I realized that the X-ray was flipped the wrong way the whole time. I had to lie to the patient that the tooth that I accidently extracted needed to go as well. FML

by Anonymous / 06/28/2016 at 12:25am / Malaysia (Perak) / Work

Today, I was trying to get my girlfriend to speak Mandarin. After speaking her first words and taking a break, she posted on Facebook: "I speak ching chong! :D :D :D" FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2016 at 8:37am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He decided to lock me in the apartment until I say that we are in fact still together. This is the 4th time he has done this. FML

by stuck / 06/12/2016 at 1:59am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Love

Today, a few weeks after moving in with my boyfriend, I borrowed his phone to Google something because mine was dead. His most recent searches? "How kill cat", "Kill cat laws", "Cat + poison". I thought he was ok with my cat when I moved in. FML

by Kitty Lover / 06/11/2016 at 3:04pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I told my dad about my new diet. He somehow figured I was only doing it to look more attractive to guys, because he told me my weight is fine and that it's just my personality that needs work. Thanks a lot, Dad. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 8:39am / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, my wife said she was going to her friend's place to help her with couponing. She started getting ready at 5pm; shaved her legs, did her hair, put on skin-tight leggings and a low-cut top. Left at 6pm, snuck back in at 2:50am. Shit, couponing must be really exciting. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:15am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my therapist told me to write down my goals for the next five years. After thinking hard for what seemed like forever, all I could come up with was getting a girlfriend and having an FML published. And to be honest, I'm not even sure about that first one. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Health