About Classy_Turtle : Just some person. Currently pondering the universe in a box canyon in the middle of nowhere.
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Classy_Turtle's favorite FMLs
Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML
by Dana / 05/10/2011 at 4:36am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm / United States / Intimacy
by anonymous / 03/19/2011 at 1:53am / United States / Transportation
by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy
by imsadnow / 01/31/2011 at 3:01pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by moxy / 01/24/2011 at 10:00am / Transportation
by saddened97 / 01/20/2011 at 4:39am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm / France / Intimacy
by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
by Tai / 10/31/2010 at 9:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML
by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 8:44pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/27/2010 at 11:07am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, I put on my new sexy lingerie to get my husband in the mood after work. When I walked into the kitchen where he was reading the newspaper, he eyed me and simply said, "Honey, please, your stomach is the biggest turnoff ever." FML
by ...thanks honey / 08/18/2010 at 2:23am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Not So Smart / 07/23/2010 at 7:47pm / Canada (Quebec) / Health
by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 5:57am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Intimacy
- Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was… Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Suddenly, he grabbed my 'lower' lips and moved them in a… Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she…