ChivasFan

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ChivasFan

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3431
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ChivasFan's page activity

Visits<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 6:51pm<b>si9303</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 2:56pm<b>Strikerr</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 7:49pm<b>MattRoseen</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 10:59pm<b>DGross</b> - the 03/01/2010 at 6:02pm<b>idkweird</b> - the 03/01/2010 at 5:54pm

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ChivasFan's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. He decided he would be a gentleman and do this to me at work, over text, during a rush of unsympathetic customers, the day before our anniversary. FML

by waaah / 06/25/2012 at 3:00am / Australia / Love

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend at the store, holding hands with his very pregnant girlfriend. They were buying baby supplies. We had a very nasty and painful breakup not even three months ago. FML

by YouAREthefather / 03/18/2010 at 12:48pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML

by Anonymous / 03/18/2010 at 6:39am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I discovered that when my parents offered to help me pay for college, what they really meant is they would get the forms for me to apply for student loans. FML

by thanxguys / 03/17/2010 at 3:03pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, I had my wisdom teeth removed. The sympathetic words from my boyfriend asked if this meant I could open my mouth a bit wider for him now. FML

by smiler / 03/17/2010 at 12:59pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I hooked up with last weekend texted me that I needed to "landscape my front lawn." FML

by Bushfan101 / 03/17/2010 at 8:48am / Intimacy

Today, I found out that I will be spending my spring break alone because my family is going to France. I can't go with them nor go with any of my friends because I have to take care of the cat. FML

by LG / 03/17/2010 at 12:18am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML

by disturbed / 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my roommate and best friend comes home late three nights a week. She goes to get drunk with some guy, then goes back to his house to hook up. Who is this guy? The guy I've been dating for three years. FML

by latenightbite / 03/16/2010 at 7:17pm / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend of a year dumped me. In my opinion, the relationship was going so well and I really thought we loved each other. When I asked why, he told me he never loved me. He just wanted to get in my pants which after a year of refusing, he finally did. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

by splitzville / 03/16/2010 at 4:12pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, after years of thinking I was weird for never being attracted to anyone, I realized that for the first time in my life I actually have a crush on someone. That 'someone' is my English teacher. He is 60. I am 18. FML

by allwrong / 03/16/2010 at 6:27am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous