Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 24 August 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 103498
  • Number of comments : 213
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Chaith : I'm Jonathan Ryan

I run a student powered contracting business, and am studying for my public accountant designation. I love travelling, fitness, and improving myself in any way that I can.

I absolutely read all of your FML stories. Thanks for being amazing.

Chaith's page activity

Visits<b>Sonata90</b> - 5 hours ago<b>ninety</b> - yesterday at 2:53pm<b>nyf137</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 8:16pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 2:10pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 10:58pm<b>katienunez</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:47pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 12:54am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 8:46pm<b>bellabow</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:49pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 10:50pm<b>melons</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 12:40pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 3:21pm<b>Quendolin</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:25am<b>Frowny</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 6:39pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 7:32pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 6:25pm<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 1:19pm<b>chip993</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 7:54pm

Fucked!<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 6:54am<b>melons</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 6:41pm<b>bellabow</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 6:58pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 12:24am<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:57pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 2:06pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 5:32pm<b>AnicaWoW</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 8:57pm<b>cunt821</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 7:25pm<b>Melanie_marii</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 10:06am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:57pm<b>TashaGayle33</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:21am<b>IVXX_</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:24am<b>max367</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 9:24pm<b>blueguy135</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:32am<b>harleygirl7</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 6:12am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:03pm<b>garit</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:17am

Chaith's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.


Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Chaith's badges

Chaith's favorite FMLs

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML


I agree, your life sucks (18414) - you deserved it (72490)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was sitting in a bar next to this gorgeous guy who kept eyeing me up and after about 30 minutes he finally leaned in to whisper something in my ear. What he said? "If I were you, I would get a push-up bra." FML


I agree, your life sucks (51636) - you deserved it (5848)

On 05/27/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by snitchovich (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19255) - you deserved it (66238)

On 05/27/2009 at 5:45am - intimacy - by arctic1 (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39789) - you deserved it (275085)

On 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Jerrrr (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19086) - you deserved it (44636)

On 05/25/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by Droolgirl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (299329) - you deserved it (162781)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12933) - you deserved it (56701)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I asked my best friend why she didn't ask our other best friend Anna to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. She said, "She's too pretty. I need ugly bridesmaids to make me look better." I am the maid of honor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (60208) - you deserved it (3621)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Neverthebride - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after a night of drinking, I woke up with some chips in my bed. I thought it was funny so I went to tell my roommate. Her response was, "That's so funny! It's a typical night out for the two of us. I wake up the next morning with a boy in my bed and you wake up with food in yours." FML


I agree, your life sucks (65192) - you deserved it (12118)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by screwed (woman) - United States

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33147) - you deserved it (45636)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42697) - you deserved it (19390)

On 05/13/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in line for Star Trek and chatting with another couple about a guy who came to the movie wearing a Starfleet uniform. We were having a good snicker about this "Geek" until my cell phone rang. My ringtone is the sound made by the Star Trek communicator. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7727) - you deserved it (81137)

On 05/12/2009 at 10:11am - misc - by Ottawa (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while powerwashing my deck, a bee flew and landed on my leg. Thinking I'd just wash it away before it stings me, I aimed the powerwasher nozzle at the bee. A bee sting isn't nearly as painful as powerwashing your leg. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12574) - you deserved it (81453)

On 05/10/2009 at 4:39pm - work - by jokada (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: