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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 January 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2494
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CaptinFalconKnig : I love pizza, puppies and FALCON PUNCH!!!!! oh yeah and call me Roy (yes from fire emblem). i'm always a nice guy but i guess a bit shy you should say.

CaptinFalconKnig's page activity

Visits<b>jasonswife423</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 1:21am<b>zipJohn</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:50am<b>MessedUpLife21</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 7:27pm<b>Unbansawsage</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 12:47am<b>Asparagusedwin</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 2:09am<b>Shbang</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:56am<b>DazonXI2</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:49pm<b>starlandmarie</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 1:14am<b>walkintotheclub</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 6:40pm<b>CDT97</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 1:13am<b>petal_pink</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:41pm<b>samv01</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:42am<b>Crossslide69</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 3:41pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:06pm<b>CloudBustah</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 1:43am<b>toiletmonkey</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 5:36pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 10:54am<b>lil_ham1644</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 8:45pm

Fucked!<b>MessedUpLife21</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 1:27am<b>DazonXI2</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 2:49am

CaptinFalconKnig's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of CaptinFalconKnig's badges

CaptinFalconKnig's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, during school, I passed out in the lunch line and hit my head on the metal rail as I fell. Rather than helping or expressing concern at all, my friends simply left my unconscious body on the floor. Why? They had to get to the lasagna before the cafeteria ran out of it. FML

Today, while refereeing a soccer game, I was accused of being racist, blind, and a fascist by spectators. The game was played by a group of third graders. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2013 at 12:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

by shut up. / 11/11/2013 at 5:36am / New Zealand / Work

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

by fmylyfe / 11/09/2013 at 9:15am / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

by :/ / 11/05/2013 at 4:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

by :/ / 11/05/2013 at 4:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to a big dinner with my insane relatives. Highlights of conversation included my sister telling us about the "country of Iowa", my dad accusing me of faking my chronic fatigue syndrome, and my grandpa claiming that Nelson Mandela is the Antichrist. FML

by FUCK ME, MAKE IT STOP / 11/01/2013 at 2:38pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

by anna / 10/31/2013 at 2:27pm / United States (Mississippi) / Kids

Today, my son came home for the fifth time saying he didn't get the job, wondering what he did wrong. I looked at his resumé; under special skills was, "Keeping it real." Apparently he saw it in a movie and thought it would work. FML

by Wheredigowrong / 10/21/2013 at 12:18am / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, I asked my students to buy a copy of Anne Frank's diary for an assignment. One of them asked me in all seriousness who wrote it. FML

by Huedadaa / 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm / France (Picardie) / Kids

Today, I had to buy a new boxcutter for work after our old one broke. It came in a box, the type which policy requires a boxcutter to open. FML

by Awahso / 10/16/2013 at 5:42pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML

by thisguy / 10/08/2013 at 5:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids