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You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
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CaptMurdock's favorite FMLs
by Raela / 01/04/2013 at 11:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, my mother-in-law purchased matching Christmas presents for myself and my sister-in-law to open together in front of everyone. Guess who are now the proud owners of matching metal tampon cases. FML
by Shelle / 12/26/2012 at 3:53am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by MiscHats / 12/14/2012 at 7:28am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by Anonymous / 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by superminty / 12/04/2012 at 3:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by embarassedmuch / 10/30/2012 at 12:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I got married. I received a beautifully wrapped gift from my dad. I was full of excitement until I opened it and found two taxidermied rabbits. The ones I had when I was in the fifth grade. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2012 at 10:48pm / United States / Money
by Albert / 09/20/2012 at 2:10am / United States / Work
by he is going to hell / 09/18/2012 at 5:46pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while working at the pet store, I had to feed the snakes. I'd thawed too many mice, so instead of wasting one, I fed it to our turtles. They decided to play tug of war with it, ripping it in half in front of several terrified children. FML
by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 12:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
- Today, I decided to sink low enough to sign up for one of those 'get paid for taking a survey site'… Today, I was running late to work and noticed that my car keys weren't in the right spot. I quickly… Today, I farted in front of my girlfriend of eight months for the first time. She got up from bed…