Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CNE0899

Offline (the 05/20/2015 at 4:29pm) | Search for a member

CNE0899

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2068
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About CNE0899 : 15 years, 6'2" and I play ball 🏀👌

CNE0899's page activity

Visits<b>briang959</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 12:24pm<b>wherestitoo</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:49am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:35pm<b>einstien007</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:35am<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 3:06am<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 2:05am<b>rachel_h</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 6:48pm<b>southernbelle_rn</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 1:31am

CNE0899's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of CNE0899's badges

CNE0899's favorite FMLs

Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML

#21406043
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32774) - you deserved it (2105)

On 05/07/2015 at 2:27am - love - by that one anon - United States (California)

Today, I heard a loud beep for over an hour. It didn't come from my phone or even an alarm of some sort. It was my son pretending to be a smoke alarm. FML

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

Today, I tripped while rushing to my classes. In a desperate attempt to regain my balance, I grabbed the nearest thing to me. A fire alarm. FML

#21394235
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28414) - you deserved it (3340)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:12pm - misc - by Drill Drilled - United States (California)

Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML

#21387543
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31937) - you deserved it (2502)

On 04/04/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by fuck right off (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I fell asleep in class... And woke up hour later. My teacher let me sit there till I woke up to see what my face would be like waking up to a new class. FML

#21382364
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25807) - you deserved it (16323)

On 03/27/2015 at 11:27am - misc - by BERNDTOAST - United States (Michigan)

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

#21380308
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30040) - you deserved it (2215)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:19pm - misc - by jumanji (man) -

Today, I walked 20 minutes in rain, winds that almost knocked me over, and face-fulls of stinging hailstones. Less than a minute after I finally got inside, the weather cleared up, the sun came out, and a rainbow appeared. FML

#21367104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30400) - you deserved it (2691)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:41am - misc - by Banana_Lord - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML

#21346789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29401) - you deserved it (3339)

On 01/30/2015 at 12:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, we had a drug search at school. After the search, we went back inside. My bag was open, and my lunch was gone. FML

#21341948
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30259) - you deserved it (2049)

On 01/21/2015 at 10:46pm - misc - by blububble412 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I let out a monstrous fart at the gym. They said it didn't even sound human. FML

#21341250
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28247) - you deserved it (6440)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:41pm - misc - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML

#21336365
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34856) - you deserved it (2856)

On 01/13/2015 at 11:25am - love - by can't win - Australia

Today, as I tried to get off the bus, my bag and the hand holding it got stuck between the exit doors. I dropped the bag in panic, but the driver wouldn't let me off until we got to the next stop. I had to walk all the way back to get my bag. FML

#21335674
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28529) - you deserved it (2691)

On 01/12/2015 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Italy (Veneto)

Today, I attended an assembly regarding senior graduation. The assistant principal told us to look to the left and right of us, because those people would be our friends for the rest of our lives. I was the only one in the entire row. FML

#21273575
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39426) - you deserved it (3989)

On 10/08/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by allergic_to_bull (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35563) - you deserved it (9615)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: