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CLEAr_to_me_now

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CLEAr_to_me_now

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 785
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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CLEAr_to_me_now's page activity

Visits<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 4:07pm<b>NotBlargo</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 2:27pm

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CLEAr_to_me_now's favorite FMLs

Today, I underwent surgery and feeling rather groggy upon being awoken, I very loudly declared, "I've always had a thing for doctors. Kiss me?" then promptly giggled, tried to launch myself in a random doctor's arms and fell flat on my face. FML

#21425055
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24760) - you deserved it (4147)

On 06/12/2015 at 3:43pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

#21409928
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32601) - you deserved it (7082)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I got banned from my favourite online video game for calling a person on my team a "Baked Potato". FML

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128) - you deserved it (30)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30326) - you deserved it (3843)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53399) - you deserved it (10751)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43531) - you deserved it (27791)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43706) - you deserved it (22715)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39522) - you deserved it (10394)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40610) - you deserved it (3239)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML

#20849955
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37627) - you deserved it (3280)

On 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm - misc - by thanksad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

#20848315
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45669) - you deserved it (22435)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I received a phone call that started with, "Now stay calm... Your house is on fire." FML

#20834558
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47595) - you deserved it (2567)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)



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