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CLEAr_to_me_now

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CLEAr_to_me_now

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  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 387
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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CLEAr_to_me_now's page activity

Visits<b>NotBlargo</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 2:27pm

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CLEAr_to_me_now's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28776) - you deserved it (5491)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30212) - you deserved it (3835)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52675) - you deserved it (10541)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43411) - you deserved it (27690)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41646) - you deserved it (21424)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39444) - you deserved it (10381)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39431) - you deserved it (3134)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML

#20849955
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37564) - you deserved it (3269)

On 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm - misc - by thanksad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

#20848315
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45424) - you deserved it (22314)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I received a phone call that started with, "Now stay calm... Your house is on fire." FML

#20834558
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47486) - you deserved it (2560)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, I crawled into bed with my boyfriend. He was snoring loudly which is how I knew he was passed out cold. Once I was under the blanket next to him, he slowly turned over, stared me straight in the face and said, "I have to kill you". Then started snoring again. FML

Today, my grandma walked into my house drunk. She was mumbling something about her being a badass because she beat someone with a pool stick at a bar. She's 68 years old. FML

#20804067
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39341) - you deserved it (3838)

On 07/26/2013 at 2:10am - misc - by dareyale (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47940) - you deserved it (13534)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, after a haircut, I walked to the cash register, handed the hairdresser a $20 bill and said, "Keep the change." He looked at me with a blank expression and replied, "The haircut costs 25 dollars." FML

#20773985
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30112) - you deserved it (46262)

On 07/10/2013 at 8:38am - misc - by RickTheBoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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