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BrandonHammmmmy

Offline (the 12/18/2014 at 12:44am) | Search for a member

BrandonHammmmmy

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 January 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 562
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About BrandonHammmmmy : 20 male, Paramedic/Volunteer firefighter. Tattoos, rock, and guitars.

BrandonHammmmmy's page activity

Visits<b>seninaa</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 4:34am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:42pm<b>jshakd642</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:55pm<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 4:24pm<b>Lindsey_Marie</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 3:15pm<b>StarDust5921</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 4:57pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:39am<b>MythBusters</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 10:05pm<b>Anthony52</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 9:52am<b>CertifiedShayne</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 10:36pm<b>seneax</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 11:14am<b>electricjjb</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 3:28pm<b>ChancellorW</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 6:17am<b>arrrrrlennie</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 10:37pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 8:35pm<b>loriprieto</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 8:28pm<b>Mariella1996</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 4:22am<b>thisbeachygirl</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 7:49pm

BrandonHammmmmy's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of BrandonHammmmmy's badges

BrandonHammmmmy's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She asked if the ring was a temporary thing until I got a better one, saw my dumbfounded face, then played it off as a joke and said yes. I later found out she'd posted on Facebook bitching about the ring, but with the privacy setting set to hide it from me. FML

#20975896
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54846) - you deserved it (4958)

On 11/30/2013 at 3:29pm - love - by fuckface? I wish (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

#20947507
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34017) - you deserved it (20710)

On 11/06/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by pathetic (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I discovered that the guy I've been seeing is a firm supporter of the Westboro Baptist Church. FML

#20947273
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54600) - you deserved it (6919)

On 11/06/2013 at 12:06am - love - by maddie - United States (Texas)

Today, I had planned to break up with my overbearing girlfriend. She went into complete denial mode, bought me a pair of oversized sunglasses and tomorrow we're going ice-skating. Kill me now. FML

#20947052
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42007) - you deserved it (10220)

On 11/05/2013 at 9:53pm - love - by Trapped. (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my relatives won't acknowledge my existence unless I'm posting a picture of my cat. They only talk about the cat. FML

#20946616
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33883) - you deserved it (3003)

On 11/05/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Steiner (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

#20946588
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38054) - you deserved it (3333)

On 11/05/2013 at 4:01pm - misc - by :/ (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was conducting surveys over the phone at work. As I called a new respondent, someone answered the phone, burped loudly, and hung up. This isn't the first time. I hate this job. FML

Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML

#20946422
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42448) - you deserved it (10087)

On 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by roughsexgonewrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, the package I've waited for months for finally arrived. It turned out it wasn't for me, but for my sister, who bought the same thing only 2 weeks ago. When I called, the company told me they received my payment, but that there were no more of the item in stock. FML

#20946407
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41137) - you deserved it (2511)

On 11/05/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by GDubeau24 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20946325
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27619) - you deserved it (54573)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44390) - you deserved it (5389)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

#20945549
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44229) - you deserved it (8108)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by UnfortunatelyAmusing (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

#20945549
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44229) - you deserved it (8108)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by UnfortunatelyAmusing (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I finally worked up enough courage to ask out the guy I've had a crush on for months. I texted him, and he thought I was Maddy from work, not Maddie his neighbor. Now he and the Maddy from his work are dating. FML

#20945397
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51058) - you deserved it (5284)

On 11/04/2013 at 5:27pm - love - by :/ (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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