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Blackphoenix

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Blackphoenix
  • Town/Country : BC, Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 4 June 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 133
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Blackphoenix : -19
-university student
-father to an awesome 1 year old boy
-gamer

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Blackphoenix's favorite FMLs

Today, we got a new dry-erase board, and I drew the Gotham City skyline complete with the Bat Signal. Later, I went downstairs, only to find my mom had written "BATMAN'S GAY" over the top of the picture. FML

#16235251
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25115) - you deserved it (9376)

On 05/18/2011 at 7:47am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML

#16235054
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27937) - you deserved it (11313)

On 05/18/2011 at 6:57am - kids - by JCC (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I took a final for my law class. As I was taking the test, I noticed the girl on my left copying off me. I wrote all the wrong answers on my sheet while writing the correct answers on my desk hoping she would copy the wrong answers down. I forgot to write the correct answers on my test. FML

#16222014
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15918) - you deserved it (58485)

On 05/17/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by markymark - United States

Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML

#16221973
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44293) - you deserved it (23166)

On 05/17/2011 at 1:34pm - money - by anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boyfriend came home from a camping trip and broke up with me. All because when he was watching the lake he was near, ripples formed. Apparently, this means God was telling him I'm impure and unable to be "saved by Christ" and therefore, a waste of his time. I dated this lunatic. FML

#16148221
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32309) - you deserved it (7668)

On 05/12/2011 at 7:34pm - love - by dammitvasquez - Canada

Today, on the school bus, I rapped on a window in an attempt to get my friend's attention. A guy sitting behind me took this as an opportunity to shove my face into the window, breaking my nose. FML

#16146603
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29321) - you deserved it (4661)

On 05/12/2011 at 5:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I finally came to terms with the fact that my girlfriend considers me a glorified ATM. FML

#16144960
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15546) - you deserved it (26615)

On 05/12/2011 at 3:25pm - love - by ClearOne (man) - United States (New York)

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11859) - you deserved it (49390)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, as I was filling out divorce paperwork, I realized that my son has had the same girlfriend through both of my marriages. He's 17. FML

#16141236
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17851) - you deserved it (49297)

On 05/12/2011 at 7:09am - love - by Username -

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

#16140473
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34569) - you deserved it (4999)

On 05/12/2011 at 3:54am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, I had a full on "conversation" with my cat about her laying off the catnip. I really need to get out more. FML

#16138835
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9546) - you deserved it (20380)

On 05/12/2011 at 12:41am - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML

#16136460
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31767) - you deserved it (11606)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -

Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML

#16131734
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27001) - you deserved it (2343)

On 05/11/2011 at 5:17pm - health - by pigeons_suck (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I worked 12 long hours cooped up in my office. Before leaving, my boss asked me whether I'll ever take my job seriously. FML

#16129629
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29205) - you deserved it (2904)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:51pm - work - by jamalinho (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)



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