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Black_Knight80's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
by lax22 / 04/13/2014 at 4:33pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML
by the long distance guy / 04/08/2014 at 3:56am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by phantomthelabrat / 03/31/2014 at 8:24am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous
Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2014 at 1:14am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by KEA_08 / 03/20/2014 at 1:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by skrumpp / 03/20/2014 at 12:15pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML
by tiredofcrazy / 03/18/2014 at 5:14am / Australia / Intimacy
by JustClaire95 / 03/17/2014 at 7:58am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Crochocinco85 / 03/13/2014 at 7:59am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML
by rolypoly / 03/05/2014 at 7:33am / United Kingdom / Health
by lacy / 03/01/2014 at 3:23am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals
by bruisedandconfused / 02/16/2014 at 5:47pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by FckMyLife / 03/24/2011 at 10:46am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML
by meantowheels / 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, my dad refused to pick me up because he didn't want to get off the couch, so I had to walk…