About BinaryGuy : Just a laid back video gamer.
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BinaryGuy's favorite FMLs
Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML
by Baustigt / 04/10/2012 at 6:48am / Australia (Western Australia) / Animals
by d0rk_ / 09/02/2011 at 4:44pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 10:08am / United States / Kids
Today, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years still refuses to memorize my phone number or remember my birthday because he says there is a limited amount of space in his brain and he does not want to push any important information out. FML
by skidoosh / 07/13/2011 at 9:44pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love
by youknowwhatitis / 06/22/2011 at 9:31am / Australia (South Australia) / Health
by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, my wife was complaining she always has to put up the Christmas tree. So this year while she was out shopping, I decided to put it up. I set it too close to the fireplace and it caught fire. I'm a firefighter. FML
by 479firefighter / 12/10/2010 at 12:11am / Love
by newmother / 12/05/2010 at 8:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Pwnedofthedead / 10/03/2009 at 11:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I was at my son's baseball game when a foul ball came flying toward my brand new car. In an attempt to save my windshield, I dove onto trying to stop the ball only to land on my windshield, crack it and see the ball land safely on the ground next to my car. FML
by baseball25635 / 10/01/2009 at 2:27pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love
Today, I saw a YouTube video of a guy scratching a knife and a screwdriver on his iPod, and at the end he showed how there were no scratches and the screen was still clean. I took my iPod touch and did the same with a knife. It didn't work. FML
by MgmEboy / 09/19/2009 at 5:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous