Bad1z

Search for a member

Offline (the 09/04/2014 at 1:43pm)

Bad1z

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 March 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2009
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Bad1z's page activity

Visits<b>bbenedict</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 12:19pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 9:10pm<b>sh07</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 1:04pm<b>taylorbrown97</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:44pm<b>sharpie2434</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 10:15am<b>liammarkowitz</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:37pm<b>lewis_de_man</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 7:52am<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 2:03pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 7:05am<b>mLove395</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 8:41am<b>MirandaShaee</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 11:45pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 5:41pm<b>Crystal55621</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 6:24pm<b>Saone</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:00am<b>Chiara92</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 8:58am<b>KhrystallDaBest</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 5:06pm<b>DividableByZero</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 12:28am<b>isminit</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 11:36am

Bad1z's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Bad1z's badges

Bad1z's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

by begging for air / 02/20/2014 at 12:45pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

by eyes wide SHIT / 12/27/2013 at 8:37pm / Australia / Animals

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

by pootie / 12/11/2013 at 8:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

by ass slap / 08/11/2013 at 11:35am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 7:10am / Latvia (Jelgavas) / Health

Today, I asked my surgeon if I would be having a general or local anesthetic at my upcoming operation. He replied, "General, of course! It's gonna be a slaughterhouse in there!" FML

by pong / 08/06/2013 at 5:59pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Health

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

by whipplewhip / 06/30/2013 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction and got off as fast as he got on. FML

by orely44 / 03/08/2013 at 9:13am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Animals

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2013 at 2:57am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous