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BTF989

Offline (the 08/11/2014 at 4:10pm) | Search for a member

BTF989

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2372
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BTF989 : I am a pirate.

BTF989's page activity

Visits<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 8:42am<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 9:37am<b>gogators941</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:43pm<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:27pm<b>hxnnxh</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:28pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 5:19pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 10:38pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:50pm<b>Role448</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:42pm<b>awiseman</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:31pm<b>xHoiHoi</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 5:40pm<b>Chixxapow</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:09pm<b>shudson186</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:23am<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:13am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 6:38am<b>heythisisme02</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:25am<b>BFons</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 9:44am<b>savvy8</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 12:31pm

BTF989's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of BTF989's badges

BTF989's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to drive mah mothers Bentley. She is out of town an told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging mah moms car. Who looool was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

#12878777
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10315) - you deserved it (72018)

On 09/03/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by ohseven6421 - United States (California)

TODAY, BOTH MAH PARANT WARA AT WORK SO I WAS HOMA ALONA. MY BOYFRIAND HAD WANTAD TO SURPRISA MA AND TAKA MA OUT TO LUNCH. HA FOUND MA DANCING ON MAH KITCHAN TABLA SINGING "LIKA A VRGIN" AT THA TOP OF MAH LUNGS. FML

#10823884
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10557) - you deserved it (30179)

On 05/28/2010 at 4:37pm - misc - by crazygirl10 - United States

Today, I laughd so hard mah milk went out mah nose in front of the boy I likd. Then, since I was looool laughing so hard about that, I accidentally fartd. Fml

#7901856
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34893) - you deserved it (8017)

On 02/05/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by hisgirl4life (woman) - United States (Missouri)

TODAY, I HAD THA SUDDAN URGA TO SNAAZA AS I WAS WIPING MY ASS!! OUT OF INSTINCT, I USD MY HAND TO COVAR MY MOUTH!! I NAVAR LAT GO OF THA TOILAT PAPAR!! FML

#7217520
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (32565)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today..!! I was snuggld in bd with mah husband!! He thought cuz mah butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky!! So he slappd mah ass hard in attempt to get something going!! I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart cuz last night I had diarrhea!! Apparently I still have it!! FML

#7084392
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25629) - you deserved it (3365)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by Lovergirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I Got A New Laptop Fir Christmas. The Picture On The Box Showd A Woman Balancing It On One Finger To Show How Light It Was, So I Trid It Myself. I Droppd Laptop, Breaking The Hard Drive And Putting A Massive Crack Down The Screen. FML

#6953909
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (89792)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

today I looool was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on mah lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

#2928893
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38839) - you deserved it (3975)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by yourmom (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, In science class I sit next to friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (141170) - you deserved it (10057)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he calld to me "I ned some help in here." Worrid I ran to the bathroom an askd himhat was wrong. He needd me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as mah hand was under his butt, he poopd again an laughd. FML

#2421163
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58809) - you deserved it (5772)

On 05/30/2009 at 12:24am - kids - by sdasdflkjas (woman) - United States

Today, I found some oversizd-strawberry-spree candie in my pantry!! They were deliciou an I munchd on them through out the day!! I endd up in an out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonder an effectivenes of Fruit Flavord Fiber pills!! FML

#2367025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13606) - you deserved it (44006)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:14am - health - by KKimrae_ness (woman) - United States (California)

Today... was mah wedding night. We had decidd to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressd and smild at mah new wife... she burst into tears and crid... "please don't make me do this." FML

#2200863
539 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218925) - you deserved it (23806)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by honeymoondisaster (woman) - United States (California)

TODAY..!! MAH PARENTS HOSTD A PARTY AT OUR HOUSE!! AFTER SEIENG ONE OF THE EXTREMELY BEAUTIFUL GUESTS..!! I WENT TO MASTER BAIT IN MAH ROOM!! WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO FINISH..!! MAH BEDROOM DOOR OPEND SUDDENLY!! IT WAS MAH MOM SHOWING AROUND 10 PARTY GUESTS THAT OUR DOG CAN OPEN DOORS!! MEGA FML

#1791192
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23532) - you deserved it (79529)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

2day cops showd up at my apartment demanding to look inside . Satisfid with the search , they told me they had receivd a noise complaint . More specifically , hearing screams someone believd a grl was getting rapd . I had two friends over and we had been wrestling . The three of us are male . FML

#966967
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70898) - you deserved it (25428)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Obee (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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