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  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 October 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3650
  • Number of comments : 371
  • Number of FMLs : 2 confirmed out of 18 posted

About Attacksloth : Welcome to my page! I moved to a small Canadian city a couple years ago, got married to the girl of my dreams, and recently completed my masters degree in history. I'm currently going to a college to gain some practical experience to go with the university experience. When I'm not spending time with my wife, or studying, I love golfing, tennis, walking, building my photography website and portfolio (ask for its url if you wish), eating sushi, watching live plays (Phantom of the Opera in Toronto soon woo!) or spending time with my cats. I probably do much more with my life, but what's the point of giving away everything about me.

Totally for chatting and making new friends. Especially if you play online Scrabble on the ISC.

Attacksloth's page activity

Visits<b>dextrementor</b> - 12 hours ago<b>battousai1995</b> - 12 hours ago<b>bigredmonkeybutt</b> - yesterday at 7:26pm<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 3:29pm<b>purplesauce</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 5:58pm<b>mariadelavita</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:58pm<b>anonyferret</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:55am<b>maybellina</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 7:04am<b>piercedbiatch</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 5:26am<b>poisonousjade</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:03pm<b>thunderniron</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 10:41pm<b>Cyntha</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:41pm<b>Dr_Manhattan</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:31am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 8:27pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 8:06pm<b>MasterTron</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:58pm<b>DejaRenee</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 2:38pm<b>ajahchenae</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:01pm

Fucked!<b>anonyferret</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 12:56pm<b>piercedbiatch</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:25am<b>Cyntha</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:13am<b>andrmac</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 6:16pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 12:14am<b>YoungFlips</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 5:52am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 5:46pm<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 4:12am<b>HowSmartOfYou</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 4:51am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 8:18am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 12:57am<b>puppies4life</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:51am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 4:25am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:15am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:41am<b>Futbol_Queen11</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:23pm<b>kieriancarter77</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 9:08pm<b>carebear1228</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:14pm

Attacksloth's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

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You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Attacksloth's badges

Attacksloth's favorite FMLs

Today, my landlord started showing my apartment, where I have lived and paid rent for over 2 years, to prospective tenants. I didn't realize that I was moving. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45299) - you deserved it (3277)

On 04/23/2014 at 8:43am - misc - by Almost_Homeless - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my teen son gave me the completed manuscript of the novel he's been working on for 4 years. Surprised and excited that he showed so much dedication to something, I volunteered to read it. I'm only on page 16 and it's absolute drivel, with grammar that makes my eyes bleed. Only 281 pages to go. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42565) - you deserved it (6446)

On 04/23/2014 at 3:17am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, my great-grandmother uttered the phrase, "Just because I'm gray up here, doesn't mean I'm gray down there!" FML


Today, I finished building a porch I've worked hard on for the past 2 weeks, and I was very proud on how amazing it turned out. Within 20 minutes of it being completed, my pregnant dog decided to crawl underneath it to have her puppies. I had to take half the porch apart to get to her and them. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46462) - you deserved it (5312)

On 04/22/2014 at 10:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the sandwich shop I work in. A customer came in and requested an assorted sub. As I finished putting on the sauces, I looked up to see the customer's face set in horror. Apparently I didn't notice that I licked my fingers clean after getting some mayonnaise on them. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52050) - you deserved it (6483)

On 04/22/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by only my life (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40056) - you deserved it (5087)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, my biology professor was giving a lecture to everyone and used me as an example. For what? Traits men are repulsed by in potential mates. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41030) - you deserved it (3461)

On 04/22/2014 at 11:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my 808 area code phone number has yet again been mistaken for a 1-800 number. I've been getting phone calls at three in the morning from people on the east coast who are trying to return their shoes. They want to speak to my supervisor because I "don't sound professional enough." FML

Today, I used a facial mask for super sensitive skin, recommended by several friends with similar skin issues. Apparently, when the warning says, "May cause some slight redness for thirty minutes", it really means, "Your face will have hives and swell to twice its normal size for several hours." FML


I agree, your life sucks (40830) - you deserved it (4772)

On 04/22/2014 at 1:31am - health - by Tomatoe Face - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55097) - you deserved it (14864)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I joked to a client that every time I see his name, I start singing the song 'Dr Jones' by Aqua. He looked blankly at me, so I broke into song, 'Dr Jones, Dr Jones, calling Dr Jones... ' He still looked blankly, but now also utterly horrified, as were the rest of the waiting room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34033) - you deserved it (11002)

On 04/21/2014 at 5:26pm - work - by banana_tree - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55825) - you deserved it (15545)

On 04/21/2014 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by sexual parrot -

Today, my drug addict of a roommate convinced herself my red kitten was Pennywise the clown in disguise waiting to kill her, and hit him over the head with a pan. FML

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59391) - you deserved it (14865)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Sue Ellen (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

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  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

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