AtomicDiamond87

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AtomicDiamond87

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1807
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

About AtomicDiamond87 : I like talking but also shy... I love rock music mostly. Some rap, hip hop, r&b, techno, classic, electronic, country, and whatever. Lol Ima geek.was in choir in high school and college. Trying to learn the piano and guitar (i still suck at both). I love dancing, not choreographed but just my style. but oh well that's enough about me. if your stopping by say least say hi...? :)

AtomicDiamond87's page activity

Visits<b>alexwagner21</b> - yesterday at 1:45pm<b>taylor_raee</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 9:07pm<b>DBKT</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 6:44pm<b>Jrsmommy2014</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 7:59am<b>Becca34</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 11:45pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 5:16pm<b>DICK_WAFFLE5</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 7:56pm<b>xHEEMxLORD</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 4:18am<b>capscapscaps43</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 9:58pm<b>fader402</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 10:48am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 10:49pm<b>Arase7</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 7:22am<b>Fed21</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 3:07pm<b>Soru</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 8:50am<b>Mewfasu</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 5:23am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 6:41pm<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 2:30pm<b>h3llsbells</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 4:30am

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 4:49am<b>MeowMcMeowenson</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 7:47am

AtomicDiamond87's FML badges

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AtomicDiamond87's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML

by Treats For Days / 07/19/2013 at 9:54am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend began to stroke my nose. "You can pick your girlfriend, but you can't pick your girlfriend's nose," I said playfully. In response, he shouted "Yes, I can!" before painfully jamming his pinky up my left nostril. FML

by booger / 07/18/2013 at 3:41am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend nicknamed my vagina after a local waterpark. It wasn't even that annoying until his friends started asking me how much I charged to let people "ride n' slide". FML

by roseland / 07/07/2013 at 4:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandoned birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it exploded and about 30 wasps came after me like the wrath of God. FML

by EpicJman2828 / 06/27/2013 at 12:27am / United States / Animals

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

by blahblah / 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I faced my severe phobia of spiders in order to remove a rather large one from my home. After 20 minutes of desperate struggling, it was finally taken care of. Relieved, I sat down and glanced across the hallway just in time to see a second, equally large spider strutting across the wall. FML

by Lepisma / 06/26/2013 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

by mymomplucksbutthair / 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm left with two non-refundable tickets to Jamaica, because my now ex-boyfriend said his Quidditch tournament is more important than seeing my "fat ass in a bikini". FML

by afraid of flying too / 06/24/2013 at 7:24pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I caught my 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend trying to use a latex glove as a condom. FML

by whatno / 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

by _Tatyana_ / 06/13/2013 at 3:05am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, a bug buzzed into my ear. In response, I punched myself in the face. FML

by sugarysofalof / 06/13/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML

by instinct / 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy