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Ataliesmiles

Offline (the 03/10/2015 at 4:22am) | Search for a member

Ataliesmiles

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 203
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Ataliesmiles : Hey... Just reading some funny fml and sharing a few of my own :)

Ataliesmiles's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Ataliesmiles's badges

Ataliesmiles's favorite FMLs

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28962) - you deserved it (6342)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mentally-unhinged mother reached a new level of psycho - she threw a tantrum and raged at my father, accusing him of cheating on her with our cat. FML

#21293397
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36371) - you deserved it (2587)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by CatLover (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32421) - you deserved it (3388)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50686) - you deserved it (9215)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48898) - you deserved it (18952)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55179) - you deserved it (22944)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML

#21232277
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48802) - you deserved it (4568)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:05am - intimacy - by pocketrocket90 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "he died" and walked away. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She reminded me I was at the funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

#21223464
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21492) - you deserved it (62644)

On 07/29/2014 at 3:58am - misc - by jayswizzle89 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53208) - you deserved it (8261)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

#21154900
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43603) - you deserved it (16259)

On 05/28/2014 at 5:12pm - misc - by chevygirl51 - United States

Today, my wife's cat ran away. After spending a lot of money making "Lost Cat" flyers and driving around for hours passing them out and searching for her cat, he walked downstairs. FML

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

#21138864
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53172) - you deserved it (7163)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by taintedlover (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47206) - you deserved it (6136)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

#21015691
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64653) - you deserved it (7600)

On 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by notsohandy (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

#21008001
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44584) - you deserved it (5345)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:23am - animals - by honeybunny90 - United States (Texas)



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