Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Aspireworks

Search for a member

Aspireworks
  • Town/Country : San Leandro, CA, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 26 February 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 291
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Aspireworks : Well hi! I'm Connor. I'm a very interesting person, I promise. So interesting, in fact, that I don't even know where to start. So I won't.

Aspireworks's last visitors

piggybitslogan1423thatonetobycoldashellaa1717badluckbrianirlCallilahtoasty_narwalsMrCrabsthisisgequitationbound

Aspireworks's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Aspireworks's badges

Aspireworks's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an asthma attack. I grabbed my inhaler and found peanut butter on it. I'm extremely allergic to peanuts. FML

#14997625
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40168) - you deserved it (3356)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:14am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I fell down some steps, and my dad laughed at me. He then changed his facebook status to "My kid's an idiot." FML

#14994829
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25254) - you deserved it (5233)

On 02/15/2011 at 9:32pm - misc - by Ihavealisp (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I printed out a picture of the popular girl in school as a sort of 'model' for how I wanted my hair cut. The hairdresser taped the picture to the mirror so he could see. Halfway through, my 'model' came in for an appointment. FML

#14993879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23186) - you deserved it (15431)

On 02/15/2011 at 8:34pm - misc - by nerdychick (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I just pulled out of the fast food drive through, only to pull right behind a septic truck. Just as I was about to dig into my food, I noticed it had a handy window about a foot round. I had a stare-down with a turd until I could pass. FML

#14990064
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15199) - you deserved it (2713)

On 02/15/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Goatbeard (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML

#14989370
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9832) - you deserved it (29307)

On 02/15/2011 at 10:30am - love - by Dj sMoZ! -

Today, the lady running the pastry shop asked who I buy the second pastry for every day. I lied and told her that it's for a coworker. I eat them both. FML

#14985221
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8507) - you deserved it (30423)

On 02/15/2011 at 1:25am - misc - by a fatty -

Today, I woke up to a good friend of mine leaving my bed. The very friend I've had a crush on for months, and knows exactly how I feel about him. Everything was great until he said, "Yeah, about last night... It's just that you were there, and I was weak. See ya." FML

#14974628
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31248) - you deserved it (5334)

On 02/14/2011 at 3:25pm - love - by Emily (woman) - France (Auvergne)

Today, I learned the hard way that if you walk up to a hobo by your car pooping, they will chase you yelling, "Get out of my bathroom!" FML

#6166961
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26667) - you deserved it (3390)

On 11/05/2009 at 12:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

#532942
331 comments


FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: