Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4558
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Arni792's page activity

Visits<b>SaintGoobers</b> - 9 hours ago<b>ijimj</b> - 12 hours ago<b>natalea_rae</b> - yesterday at 10:08pm<b>missmorggan</b> - yesterday at 6:37pm<b>juststephhere</b> - yesterday at 3:21pm<b>charrbee90</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:46pm<b>simmyiphone</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:02am<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 8:21pm<b>Lagalette</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:55pm<b>feiona1</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:58pm<b>loveekaytlin</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 7:33pm<b>Hasee</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:28pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:08pm<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 2:22am<b>captain_crook</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 4:24pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 3:30pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:32pm<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:28pm

Liked!<b>charrbee90</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:31am<b>EmsyyyRose13</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>Ki11erRabbit</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:52am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:30am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 1:15am<b>xninix</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:25am<b>iireenee</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:44pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:41pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:38pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:46am<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:11pm<b>Chelserser</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:53pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:10pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 7:39am<b>DefiantGirl</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 6:06pm<b>DestinyNiya</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 5:00pm<b>G00N3R</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 2:14pm<b>AU_Lovebird</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 11:41am

Arni792's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Arni792's badges

Arni792's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12425) - you deserved it (40517)

On 06/07/2011 at 3:50am - intimacy - by Kate (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML


I agree, your life sucks (60356) - you deserved it (12618)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26376) - you deserved it (8493)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. He parked his truck and reached in his door side pocket and grabbed a little black zippered bag. Seeing this, I burst out laughing saying, "Wow, what's that, your change purse?" He replied, "No, I'm diabetic, this is my blood sugar monitor." FML


I agree, your life sucks (9835) - you deserved it (81259)

On 05/04/2011 at 1:33am - love - by Cuppycake (woman) - Canada

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44856) - you deserved it (5622)

On 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by Scarlett - United States (Washington)

Today, I was talking to a guy on the phone. I told him I'd be right back. I thought I'd put him on mute. Turns out he heard everything as I took the biggest dump I've ever taken. We haven't talked since. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14163) - you deserved it (39531)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:31am - love - by Payte -

Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (36839) - you deserved it (4814)

On 04/05/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by notacreeper -

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML


I agree, your life sucks (46965) - you deserved it (13913)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42161) - you deserved it (28699)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48842) - you deserved it (27539)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35909) - you deserved it (2888)

On 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML


I agree, your life sucks (30067) - you deserved it (52130)

On 03/21/2011 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by fffmmll - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19459) - you deserved it (88943)

On 03/16/2011 at 3:31am - intimacy - by eric - United States

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (109708) - you deserved it (6566) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: