About AppleJacksBrony : Brony on!
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AppleJacksBrony's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out that, given the correct velocity, a used condom can actually fly through a tiny window and slap you on the leg. I also found out that when you go to the window to yell at the perpetrator, they might have more ammunition. FML
by Attacksloth / 04/23/2015 at 6:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by burnswhenipee / 04/07/2015 at 8:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML
by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids
Today, I moved into my new apartment. As I sat in my living room watching Netflix, I found out that my window has an excellent view of my new neighbors, who just so happen to like to shag with the blinds open. I guess I'll be buying some curtains. FML
by curtain buyer / 03/08/2015 at 9:05pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, after a 7 year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML
by love and tolerape, apparently / 03/01/2015 at 2:24pm / India (Jharkhand) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/08/2015 at 11:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
by Anonymous / 02/07/2015 at 4:03pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Milked Richard / 02/05/2015 at 11:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my girlfriend and all of our friends have begun referring to the time I was meant to lose my virginity, but couldn't get hard, as the "cheese stick incident." They all think it's hilarious, and the worst part is that it's actually a pretty appropriate description. FML
by Anonymous / 12/18/2014 at 5:45pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML
by IHateSchool-.- / 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm / United States / Work
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML
by Brasilian29 / 12/11/2014 at 7:01am / United States (California) / Love
Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML
by Anonymous / 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm / Ireland (Galway) / Love
Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML
by .__. / 12/07/2014 at 3:10am / United Kingdom (Brent) / Miscellaneous
by elissak / 12/07/2014 at 1:58am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous