About AlphaPrice : I do what I think is right.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
AlphaPrice's favorite FMLs
Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML
by Emliy / 08/01/2014 at 1:06am / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML
by and the truth comes out / 07/22/2014 at 4:44am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by teegtwo / 07/22/2014 at 1:55am / United States / Intimacy
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
by DolphinGirl369 / 06/07/2013 at 12:33am / United States (Iowa) / Animals
by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by BadBoyfriend / 06/03/2013 at 12:31am / United States (Texas) / Love
by SteroidPenguin / 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
by Susan / 03/18/2013 at 4:59am / Ireland / Intimacy
Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML
by karmamaybe / 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm / United States (South Dakota) / Miscellaneous
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
by williebees / 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by agh marriage / 10/11/2012 at 1:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/09/2012 at 5:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML
by crabmunch15 / 09/09/2012 at 1:38am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got into an argument with my mom over her sexist, emotionally-abusive boyfriend. I told her that either he goes or I go. She called me a disrespectful bastard for not respecting my "new father." I'm now sitting outside a McDonald's with my suitcase, leeching their WiFi. FML
by Anonymous / 09/08/2012 at 1:27pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to… Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've… Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to…