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Alostfart

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Alostfart
  • Town/Country : Stockholm, Sweden
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 February 1997 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 2635
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Alostfart : Hello!

You might wonder who I am and so do I! Anyway, I'm glad to see you! Or well that depends on who you are... Never mind :P

I'm a 15 year old pastafarian girl with a lot of humor! I live in Sweden but I've promised myself that I WILL NOT spend the rest of my life here.

I'm named alostfart cause that's kind of what we all are. Lost farts, flying around looking for the love of our life or the job... Of our lifes...?

Well I'm reading FML because seeing what other people are dealing with always makes your own life suck a little less right? ;)

Thanks for reading this! Bye stranger!

Alostfart's last visitors

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Alostfart's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Alostfart's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend finally proposed. His reason? A Las Vegas wedding came up on Groupon. FML

#19367964
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20384) - you deserved it (2477)

On 03/29/2012 at 1:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my professor called me out in the middle of a lecture to ask why I was bleeding. I then had to explain to him, in front of around one hundred of my fellow classmates, that my largest zit had burst. FML

#19367861
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21350) - you deserved it (2206)

On 03/29/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Jayne - United States

Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML

#19367140
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21737) - you deserved it (1570)

On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

#19363371
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7484) - you deserved it (21335)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 27 year old boyfriend chose playing with Lego over making sweet love to me. FML

#19363269
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20177) - you deserved it (9622)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML

#19362794
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18754) - you deserved it (2109)

On 03/28/2012 at 9:52am - misc - by andromeda80 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I dislocated my elbow chasing my cat around the hardwood floors of my house in knee-high socks and wiping out going around a corner. The doctors suggested that I not tell people how it happened. FML

#19362512
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9732) - you deserved it (16421)

On 03/28/2012 at 8:00am - health - by hikari_chan_xo - United States (Michigan)

Today, I received a coupon for a special offer including flights and accommodation for the honeymoon destination that my fiancé and I are keen on. Yesterday, I paid the full price for the flight tickets and hotel deposit for the honeymoon. FML

#19362332
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19975) - you deserved it (2038)

On 03/28/2012 at 6:47am - money - by honeymooner (man) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to read my dog's mind. FML

#19361987
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4635) - you deserved it (24088)

On 03/28/2012 at 2:57am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got pulled into a conversation about my 62 year old boss's new breast implants. FML

#19354471
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16350) - you deserved it (1714)

On 03/26/2012 at 10:36pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was not yet wearing my bouncer uniform when a fight broke out at a club. I intervened, only to have the cops who showed up tase me because they thought I was part of it. FML

#19353440
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17331) - you deserved it (2898)

On 03/26/2012 at 8:17pm - work - by ramis182 - United States (Washington)

Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML

#19352792
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16004) - you deserved it (4333)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:33pm - money - by Sharkie49 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML

#19352692
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16317) - you deserved it (2934)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States

Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML

#19352166
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18686) - you deserved it (4833)

On 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm - intimacy - by JC (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML

#19350917
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17634) - you deserved it (2692)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:15pm - misc - by Shantwozzlah (woman) - United States (Florida)



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