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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 February 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7575
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Alostfart : Hello!

You might wonder who I am and so do I! Anyway, I'm glad to see you! Or well that depends on who you are... Never mind :P

I'm a 15 year old pastafarian girl with a lot of humor! I live in Sweden but I've promised myself that I WILL NOT spend the rest of my life here.

I'm named alostfart cause that's kind of what we all are. Lost farts, flying around looking for the love of our life or the job... Of our lifes...?

Well I'm reading FML because seeing what other people are dealing with always makes your own life suck a little less right? ;)

Thanks for reading this! Bye stranger!

Alostfart's page activity

Visits<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 3:26pm<b>edenxero</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 2:05am<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 2:10am<b>TechFire</b> - the 03/08/2012 at 8:34pm

Alostfart's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Alostfart's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

by IloveJapan / 04/02/2012 at 10:02am / Japan / Love

Today, my dad came home drunk at four in the morning. He walked into my room, screaming at me to wake up so he can kill zombies. FML

by Deadman / 04/02/2012 at 9:37am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

by minimum wage / 04/02/2012 at 4:38am / Canada / Work

Today, I came home from work to find a burglar in my house. He then said that he was just leaving, and went back out of the broken window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad told me it would be fine to use the mounting tape he'd bought to place paintings up in my newly painted room. I did, but after deciding I wanted to move a painting and pulling it off the wall, the wall came with it. Back to square one. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 11:59pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, the only person to wish me a happy birthday was a survey website. I took their stupid survey out of appreciation. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 10:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

by ohgod... / 04/01/2012 at 10:18pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I took a very expensive flight to New York City for a job interview. I waited in my hotel room all day for the phone call to go to my once in a lifetime interview. By noon I was nervous, eight I was pissed. Around ten I realized my phone was still in airplane mode. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2012 at 8:35am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my boyfriend of 3 months broke up with me because he is moving. He's only moving 20 minutes away. FML

by swim5 / 03/31/2012 at 8:22am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, on my way to my therapist, my father told me to lie to her and tell her that I'm happy so he doesn't have to drive me in anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a used condom in my trash can. I have been happily married to my wife for 7 years, and we use other forms of birth control. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2012 at 12:49am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML

by GetHardOrGoHome / 03/31/2012 at 12:22am / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML

by James / 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm / United States / Kids

Today, an old lady savagely shoved me out of a queue, after I'd been waiting for twenty minutes. I couldn't bring myself to fight back or say anything, and ended up dragging my sorry arse to the back of the queue. FML

by dannyboy / 03/30/2012 at 12:44pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got on the train with my bike, leaning it up against the wall. After a while, it began to slide down the wall and wobble, so I dashed out to catch it. As I ran for it, I slipped and crashed into it, knocking it into an old man and busting the rear brake. FML

by Anonymous / 03/30/2012 at 10:42am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous