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Alicestraza

Offline (yesterday at 8:11pm) | Search for a member

Alicestraza

129Fucked!

AlicestrazaAlicestraza
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5144
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Alicestraza : 💖💜💙

Alicestraza's page activity

Visits<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - 13 hours ago<b>twistedtwincity</b> - 14 hours ago<b>zjay</b> - 16 hours ago<b>lil_jimmy</b> - yesterday at 3:46am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - yesterday at 11:55pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 9:30am<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:41am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:37am<b>gis0392</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:19am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 9:06am<b>vegemute</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:50am<b>noelperez1791</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:58am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:01pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 9:15am<b>Holijust</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:34pm<b>ninthfirewings</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 8:29am<b>validatethis</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:05am<b>Cameron257</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:27am

Fucked!<b>zjay</b> - 10 hours ago<b>noelperez1791</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:58am<b>cccook1547</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:34am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:47pm<b>hun3y206</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:05am<b>hallieee</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:30am<b>greaterdane</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:01am<b>terspal</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:46pm<b>myeviltwin</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 3:09am<b>Cayers97</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 4:34pm<b>Megatron_Griffin</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:35pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:07pm<b>AK7186</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:24pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:43am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:52am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:12am<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:47pm

Alicestraza's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Alicestraza's badges

Alicestraza's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51406) - you deserved it (4175)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at my therapy appointment, I was spilling my guts to my therapist. When I'd finished, to get rid of the awkward silence, I asked, "I'm not crazy, right?" His response was, "That's bit of a loaded question." FML

#21066990
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34627) - you deserved it (5296)

On 02/20/2014 at 9:46pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML

#21061712
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46304) - you deserved it (5918)

On 02/15/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the creepy guy I turned down for a date almost six years ago, sent me a box of rotting flowers with a note calling me a cunt. FML

#21060455
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45702) - you deserved it (8005)

On 02/14/2014 at 4:23pm - love - by fuck you right back, cockspit (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

#21055217
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39113) - you deserved it (7513)

On 02/09/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by took it - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my sister what she thought of my boyfriend. She said, "He's nice. Deserves better than you, really." FML

#21048143
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42667) - you deserved it (5775)

On 02/02/2014 at 1:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mother-in-law called me every 2 hours, starting at 8pm and stopping at 10am the following morning. She says that since my wife and I are expecting our first child, I should "get used to waking up at all hours." She calls my work phone, which I'm not allowed to switch off. FML

Today, trying to get some much needed rest, I heard my neighbors fighting loudly. When they finally quit, they left a DVD on, directly behind my wall: Spongebob, with the menu tune on loop. FML

#21025356
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43669) - you deserved it (3569)

On 01/12/2014 at 6:04am - misc - by tired individual (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46004) - you deserved it (4950)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54462) - you deserved it (15715)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML

#20995972
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44768) - you deserved it (6476)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm - money - by pissed (woman) - United States

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

#20981063
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45304) - you deserved it (5611)

On 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by KarateKid76 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39133) - you deserved it (13388)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)



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