Alicestraza

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Offline (the 12/30/2015 at 7:22pm)

Alicestraza

146Fucked!

AlicestrazaAlicestraza
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6653
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Alicestraza : 💖💜💙

Alicestraza's page activity

Visits<b>pred8885</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 5:06pm<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 4:56am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 12:52am<b>Zatalmas</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 9:19am<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 1:44am<b>ZeroDark30</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 7:27pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 3:10am<b>Weemandarin</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:30pm<b>Robby2448</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 9:56am<b>shjoh</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 11:59am<b>Ezellianna</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 6:33pm<b>supermarxiste75</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 5:21pm<b>am1717</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 12:38am<b>nikkibodnarchuk</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 12:04am<b>minimanion</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:35pm<b>Xarzith</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:58pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 4:28am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 11:50am

Fucked!<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 9:10am<b>Robby2448</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 3:57pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 1:53pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 4:35am<b>TheDragonsGuard</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 11:03pm<b>pd2902</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 2:36am<b>juice_33</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 12:32am<b>abby1212</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 10:37pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 5:33am<b>apineapple</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 5:51am<b>thee_most_dope</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 6:29pm<b>missycanfly</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:19pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:15am<b>koganti</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:42pm<b>kreesan</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 7:41pm<b>zoulou48</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:21pm<b>Zurg_676</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:41am<b>zjay</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 3:36am

Alicestraza's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Alicestraza's badges

Alicestraza's favorite FMLs

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

by SadAndDeaf / 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

by the3goatlady / 09/01/2014 at 12:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

by emilyparker / 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

by disappointedjamaican / 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

by sam_666777 / 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "he died" and walked away. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She reminded me I was at the funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

by jayswizzle89 / 07/29/2014 at 3:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

by NosChersVoisins / 07/01/2014 at 12:55am / France (Aquitaine) / Love

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

by IAMALITAHA / 06/27/2014 at 2:11am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Work

Today, I was on vacation, when a very cute guy starting talking to me and asked me what my name was. Overwhelmed and stressed out, I blurted out that I didn't have one. FML

by Boulette / 06/23/2014 at 1:44am / Love

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

by not_this_shit_again / 04/09/2014 at 8:37am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making a special birthday delivery for a customer. As I handed her the fruit basket, I said, "Hey, we have the same birthday! Happy birthday!" She called me an attention whore and slammed the door in my face. FML

by Ma_Nikka / 03/19/2014 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

by HanBroman / 03/17/2014 at 4:05am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm bisexual. He dumped me because apparently now there is "too much competition". FML

by biwhat / 03/08/2014 at 4:23am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love