Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Alicestraza

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

Alicestraza

127Fucked!

AlicestrazaAlicestraza
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5084
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Alicestraza : 💖💜💙

Alicestraza's page activity

Visits<b>flupsht</b> - 22 hours ago<b>Holijust</b> - yesterday at 11:34pm<b>ninthfirewings</b> - yesterday at 8:29am<b>validatethis</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:05am<b>Cameron257</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:27am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:53pm<b>cccook1547</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 6:34pm<b>sherbear78</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:33pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:52pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:47pm<b>python199</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 10:01pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:16am<b>FireDemon_101</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 6:13pm<b>hun3y206</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 5:05am<b>hallieee</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 7:29pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 2:21am<b>Mons</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 10:05am<b>greaterdane</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 6:01pm

Fucked!<b>cccook1547</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:34am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:47pm<b>hun3y206</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:05am<b>hallieee</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:30am<b>greaterdane</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:01am<b>terspal</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:46pm<b>myeviltwin</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 3:09am<b>Cayers97</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 4:34pm<b>Megatron_Griffin</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:35pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:07pm<b>AK7186</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:24pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:43am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:52am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:12am<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:47pm<b>Holijust</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:22am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 3:03pm

Alicestraza's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Alicestraza's badges

Alicestraza's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

#21249351
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45301) - you deserved it (4751)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm - love - by emilyparker - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48426) - you deserved it (4005)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37912) - you deserved it (9627)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "he died" and walked away. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She reminded me I was at the funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

#21223464
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21491) - you deserved it (62644)

On 07/29/2014 at 3:58am - misc - by jayswizzle89 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56425) - you deserved it (5220) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41654) - you deserved it (4228)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

#21108356
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43178) - you deserved it (3258)

On 04/09/2014 at 8:37am - misc - by not_this_shit_again (man) - Singapore

Today, I was making a special birthday delivery for a customer. As I handed her the fruit basket, I said, "Hey, we have the same birthday! Happy birthday!" She called me an attention whore and slammed the door in my face. FML

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46447) - you deserved it (6799)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm bisexual. He dumped me because apparently now there is "too much competition". FML

#21081103
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44987) - you deserved it (13342)

On 03/08/2014 at 4:23am - love - by biwhat (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

#21078266
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42384) - you deserved it (6908)

On 03/04/2014 at 9:46pm - misc - by augiedd (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class. One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation. She was serious. FML

#21076929
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41694) - you deserved it (4490)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:58pm - work - by Biologyfacepalm (woman) - United States

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25414) - you deserved it (55846)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: