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Alicestraza

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

Alicestraza

137Fucked!

AlicestrazaAlicestraza
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5342
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Alicestraza : 💖💜💙

Alicestraza's page activity

Visits<b>delfino1604</b> - 3 hours ago<b>AyeTee77</b> - 9 hours ago<b>crisanba</b> - 14 hours ago<b>TJJOE</b> - yesterday at 7:43am<b>apineapple</b> - yesterday at 11:51pm<b>khoov19</b> - yesterday at 4:09pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 2:45pm<b>tiger820</b> - yesterday at 2:01pm<b>thee_most_dope</b> - yesterday at 12:29pm<b>kingdutchhy</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 7:37am<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 6:42am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 11:45am<b>mo3zz</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 10:12am<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:52am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:50am<b>flufee2</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:28pm<b>missycanfly</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 4:19pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:16am

Fucked!<b>apineapple</b> - yesterday at 5:51am<b>thee_most_dope</b> - yesterday at 6:29pm<b>missycanfly</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:19pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:15am<b>koganti</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:42pm<b>kreesan</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 7:41pm<b>zoulou48</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:21pm<b>Zurg_676</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:41am<b>zjay</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 3:36am<b>noelperez1791</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:58am<b>cccook1547</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:34am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:47pm<b>hun3y206</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:05am<b>hallieee</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:30am<b>terspal</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:46pm<b>myeviltwin</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 3:09am<b>Cayers97</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 4:34pm<b>Megatron_Griffin</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:35pm

Alicestraza's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Alicestraza's badges

Alicestraza's favorite FMLs

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50792) - you deserved it (2868)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

#21249351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47134) - you deserved it (4936)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm - love - by emilyparker - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48458) - you deserved it (4007)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38617) - you deserved it (9798)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "he died" and walked away. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She reminded me I was at the funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

#21223464
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21503) - you deserved it (62673)

On 07/29/2014 at 3:58am - misc - by jayswizzle89 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60332) - you deserved it (5707) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42886) - you deserved it (4336)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

#21108356
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45484) - you deserved it (3447)

On 04/09/2014 at 8:37am - misc - by not_this_shit_again (man) - Singapore

Today, I was making a special birthday delivery for a customer. As I handed her the fruit basket, I said, "Hey, we have the same birthday! Happy birthday!" She called me an attention whore and slammed the door in my face. FML

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46477) - you deserved it (6804)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm bisexual. He dumped me because apparently now there is "too much competition". FML

#21081103
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45245) - you deserved it (13396)

On 03/08/2014 at 4:23am - love - by biwhat (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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