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Offline (the 01/04/2016 at 10:11pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 811
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Alhamdulilah : "Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world. We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy."

- Joseph Campbell
follow me on Ig: malnoor

Alhamdulilah's page activity

Visits<b>Quendolin</b> - the 06/02/2016 at 11:31am<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 7:11pm<b>chutney_02</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 7:09pm<b>Si123</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 5:59pm<b>mxgirl1998</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:32pm<b>ToxicPlant</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 4:16pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:07pm<b>lovely_mess3</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 2:47am<b>aspenmoon</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 2:23am<b>epeeftw</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:39pm<b>the_fanciest_man</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:26pm<b>SadGirl18</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:24pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:50pm<b>mermaidgirl5413</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:09am<b>Llamanator9913</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:36pm<b>tealrobot</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:38pm<b>djoudjou7598</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 6:51am<b>DCA16</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 7:02pm

Fucked!<b>mxgirl1998</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 2:32am

Alhamdulilah's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.


Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Alhamdulilah's badges

Alhamdulilah's favorite FMLs

Today, I opened my window due to the good weather. I was lucky enough to listen to the sounds of someone violently throwing up for over an hour. The window got stuck open. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2014 at 8:59pm / Health

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

by vee2013 / 04/26/2014 at 12:22am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML

by coppervains / 02/22/2014 at 1:13pm / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

by took it / 02/09/2014 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

by RaccoonFever / 01/10/2014 at 6:15am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, when I am asked to do something and I don't do it immediately, my mother threatens to "twerk" in front of my friends. FML

by FMLPLZ / 01/02/2014 at 9:52pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad is going through a midlife crisis. He now wants to be less like a dad and more like a "best friend" to me. This mainly involves him constantly texting me, sending me stuff on Snapchat, and saying stuff like "wicked cool", "bazinga", and "swag" every chance he gets. FML

by fuck off, dad / 01/02/2014 at 12:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I did the "walk of shame" sixteen blocks. It wouldn't have been so bad if the sidewalks and streets weren't completely covered in ice. Somewhere along the way I lost what little dignity I had left, along with my left shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2013 at 6:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm / United States / Love

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML

by neuroticallyours / 11/12/2009 at 2:11am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy