About AlexaWuzHere : Just your average college kid trying to get into medical school.
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AlexaWuzHere's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 12:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
by ohbiebjetaime / 06/30/2012 at 4:09pm / France / Love
Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML
by rs / 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm / Egypt / Miscellaneous
by audreyav / 06/30/2012 at 4:10am / United States (Oregon) / Animals
Today, I was going through a hard and painful break up after a long relationship. Trying to get over it, I invited my two best friends over to lift my spirits. The night ended with them making out on my bed as I sat alone in the other room. FML
by anonymous / 06/30/2012 at 2:26am / United States (Colorado) / Love
by mpsteve137 / 06/30/2012 at 2:21am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I was trying to put some new curtains up. I couldn't make sense of the instructions, so I decided to wing it. I spent a frustrating half hour fighting with it, and just seconds after I succeeded, the curtain rod gave way and slammed straight onto my head. FML
by Anonymous / 06/29/2012 at 6:46pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Miscellaneous
Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML
by Nick / 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know..." FML
by friend / 06/29/2012 at 4:48pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Kids
by JJBones / 06/29/2012 at 6:03am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by zombieguyswife / 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
by Bernadette / 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…