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Airborn0280's favorite FMLs
Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 2:02pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by shh / 10/09/2015 at 3:06am / United States (Arizona) / Kids
Today, I told my boyfriend I was horny and was waiting for him at my place. 30 minutes later, he still hadn't arrived, so I called him and asked if he was coming. He replied "Already did, right into a kleenex." and hung up. FML
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 8:26am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 3:06am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Unknown / 12/23/2014 at 1:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML
by Anonymos_fmler / 10/20/2014 at 8:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by John / 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/16/2014 at 9:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by facepalm / 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/04/2014 at 10:58am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by whydoidothis / 10/03/2014 at 7:29am / United Kingdom / Work
by impure / 09/29/2014 at 12:48pm / United States / Health
Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML
by tbree / 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm / United States (California) / Health
by hypercrite dad / 09/19/2014 at 2:34pm / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML
by Anonymous / 09/19/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
- Today, at work I made an error in till and now owe $50. pretty much all the money I earned today is… Today, I walked in on my boyfriend having sex with my twin sister. I have been on birth control for… Today, I went on a first date with an attractive guy. At the end of it, he ended up holding my bag…