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AdvanceMind

Offline (the 11/18/2014 at 2:26pm) | Search for a member

AdvanceMind

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  • Number of visits : 3004
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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AdvanceMind's page activity

Visits<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:53pm

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50 favourites

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AdvanceMind's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new roommate. I thought he was pretty cool until he mentioned how everything around us was a conspiracy. Then he asked if I knew how to make a bomb. FML

#21294024
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31204) - you deserved it (2240)

On 11/07/2014 at 10:51am - misc - by NoToBombs - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend after I found him cheating on me with my best friend. It ended up with me apologising for spying on him. FML

#21293948
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33537) - you deserved it (15822)

On 11/07/2014 at 7:28am - love - by Turnaround (woman) -

Today, my mum was in a bad mood, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her I love her, and giving her a hug. She slapped me hard enough to leave a red, hand-shaped mark on my face, and told me to fuck off with my "sarcasm". FML

#21293904
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37188) - you deserved it (3185)

On 11/07/2014 at 3:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was sick and had soccer trials on the same day. At the soccer trials, the coach called me over and told me I was doing really good and to keep it up. I said thanks and vomited on him. FML

#21293843
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33423) - you deserved it (3056)

On 11/07/2014 at 12:47am - health - by jj - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML

#21293677
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29661) - you deserved it (13412)

On 11/06/2014 at 8:55pm - animals - by dwood08 - United States (New York)

Today, I spent over $2,000 on a big flatscreen TV. My dad insisted I let him mount it on the wall instead of paying someone to do it. All seemed fine, until the TV came loose and smashed onto the floor. My dad refuses to accept responsibility, and says I should've had a professional install it instead. FML

#21293581
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40498) - you deserved it (6506)

On 11/06/2014 at 6:37pm - money - by Anonymou$ (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mentally-unhinged mother reached a new level of psycho - she threw a tantrum and raged at my father, accusing him of cheating on her with our cat. FML

#21293397
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35077) - you deserved it (2464)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by CatLover (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (7631)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36470) - you deserved it (2408)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to give my boyfriend a surprise striptease. After I turned around, I heard him murmur "Oh, wow." I turned back around, only to find him watching a gif of a cat falling into snow in slow motion. FML

#21291260
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35696) - you deserved it (4134)

On 11/03/2014 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Dezzy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

#21291250
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40759) - you deserved it (4610)

On 11/03/2014 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by EliseV (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own moaning prevents me from reaching my peak. I'm my own turn off. FML

#21290790
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36467) - you deserved it (5814)

On 11/02/2014 at 8:31pm - intimacy - by SelfServiced - United States (California)

Today, while my husband and I were having sex, my cat decided to join in on our moans by crying at the door the entire time. He stopped as soon as we finished. FML

Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML

#21290736
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33123) - you deserved it (6388)

On 11/02/2014 at 7:11pm - money - by ethawesome1125 - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

#21290572
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35027) - you deserved it (3896)

On 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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